You're doing it wrong.

RetiredToker76

Well-Known Member
Being an insomniac I'll stay up all f'n night. I do however tuck my wife into bed and make sure she's comfy when she goes to bed around 9 or 10.

Well the other night I cuddled her for a little while. We had the windows open for this beautiful weather. As we cuddled we heard, 'Cough, hack hack hack, cough cough.' Coming from the rear neighbors.

My wife rolled over and said, "You're doing it wrong, dumb ass."

She's a NOVICE toker, a total of 3 times. I just started rolling in laughter. After she fell asleep I went out on the porch to have a cig.

At ground level the sound effect were MUCH more interesting. I heard the bong bubbling as this individual took their hit. Then a repeat of what we heard upstairs.

About 30 seconds passed and the bong started bubbling again, this time for my own amusement I timed the hit on my watch. This person hit for a good 45 seconds and immediately started hacking up a lung, absolutely no time to hold it in.

This individual repeated the process. Finally I got bored an walked to the end of the patio and yelled. "Dude, take smaller hits, hold them longer, and you'll feel MUCH better!"

There were cackles of giggles and then I hear.

"Man I think he's got a good idea."

Then there was about 15 seconds of bubbling, a good 10 - 15 second break, and THEN coughing.

The next thing I heard was 'Wow.'

I say 'individual' because the coughing, laughing, and reply's could either me a late high school to college aged girl or a prepubescent boy, I have no idea which it was. It was some funny shit though!


-RT76
 

superhighme

Well-Known Member
the best part is when people are trying to be discreet and you catch them (certainly better than someone else catchin them ;)

I love it when I go to the store or like a local campus and there is always like one person sitting in their car pretending to read something or look for something. and all i can think is "Dude, do you seriously think no one can smell that?" sometimes I think it would be kind of funny to go up to the window and be like just so you know I know what you're doing and then walk away. *queue stoner paranoia*

and I notice they always try to park out of the way and like not near any other cars. DONT YOU THINK.... if you're trying to blend in that parking all the way at the back end of a lot by yourself sitting in a car is going to be kind of obvious?!?!?! blend in a little.
 

lordblunterist

Well-Known Member
lol i was just thinking the same thing i was reading the previous post when i got half way threw i started to mumble and then said yer fuck it.. i get ur drift
 

DaGambler

Well-Known Member
me thinks its a real girl. that picture reminds me of a pixie... or a fairy... or a nympho... (wait, that's 'nymp', right?) :D in any case, i need a girl friend !!!
 

MrHowardMarks

Well-Known Member
Funny story... But on the contrary, if you really rip the hell outta a bong and hold it... It's intense, only thing better is if it's kief!
 

ugzkmk

Well-Known Member
thats great.

i always see people driving around smokin pipes or people walking down the street with a blunt in hand. and i live in a pretty suburbia like neighborhood.

and you should have told them they dont need to told it in that long either. 10 seconds MAX!
 

MrHowardMarks

Well-Known Member
the best part is when people are trying to be discreet and you catch them (certainly better than someone else catchin them ;)

I love it when I go to the store or like a local campus and there is always like one person sitting in their car pretending to read something or look for something. and all i can think is "Dude, do you seriously think no one can smell that?" sometimes I think it would be kind of funny to go up to the window and be like just so you know I know what you're doing and then walk away. *queue stoner paranoia*

and I notice they always try to park out of the way and like not near any other cars. DONT YOU THINK.... if you're trying to blend in that parking all the way at the back end of a lot by yourself sitting in a car is going to be kind of obvious?!?!?! blend in a little.



Hahahahaha that was you?


Just kidding, I was busted hotboxing my car out with a couple buddies outside the poolhall... Seriously, you couldn't see out the windows, and all the sudden DISCO PARTY and a little cop was on me, the car was off, so I couldn't roll down the window... So I popped open the door, the cop grabbed for his gun...

I put my hands up and said,"Chill out man, am I in trouble for something?"


As what could be best described as an atomic cloud of smoke billowed out from my vehicle...

He put me in his car, and I talked and talked about medicinal mj and "it's only a matter of time."



Now I am pretty low key, I smoke bowls driving, just act normal...

Mostly I smoke joints...



When I'm at a bar, I'll go out to have a smoke, and just act normal, like it's a cig... It's funny when people start searching for who's got the dank... My joints look kinda like cigs... (Pics) https://www.rollitup.org/members/mrhowardmarks-74975-albums-roll-it-up.html

 

RetiredToker76

Well-Known Member
oh btw..... I just wanted to say to the title of the thread....

THATS WHAT SHE SAID!!!
Ya I know... it was the BEST part of it for me..

I felt like Yoda and having my student listen. It was fun giving her Bong lessons and watching her pay such close attention so she didn't look like a complete noob with our friends. I was so proud of her, both at her first toke and when she called out the kids behind our house.

-RT76
 
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