i wasted many years on an ex like that too, man was that hell.
and you're right, maybe one day she'll come around. i did make a slightly good impression on her friday- she was out for the day so i took 4 blotters i had in hopes of having a decent day. they were very very weak though, felt like i only had one, so i just spent the day cleaning the house. needless to say she was happy about it when she came back, and i made sure to point out "see how productive i can be on acid?" lol
i was hoping to go to mars though, and i didnt even land on the moon, just orbited a little. better luck next time.