TheSnake
Well-Known Member
I ive kinda known ive had an issue for a long ass time. I have an uncanny need for self improvement that overwhelms me one phase to the next, weather its motorcycle riding skills, wanting to be a stunt rider, for many years, fail. Or working out trying to be an armature bodybuilder (ex fat guy), fail. Or growing and exploring opportunities with drugs, (so far so good). granite i take years for each phase, so im sure ill have to climb the drug scale, and nothing bothers me more than failing at my perspective bullshit jobs (ive had like 30, and im 26 years old) lol. anyways, I still ride, been riding for over ten years, and i still work out, been doing that for over 8 now. I had mini attempts at the drug biz in the form of growing although i do like to smoke a phat one from time to time, its not my absolute drug of choice, although to relax and sleep, it well surpasses alcohol for me. So its still up there, Ive experimented with a few pain killers, and amphetamines (good stuff for cleaning house), cocaine (bullshit for price compared to amphetamines), weed (duh), molly (love it), few others? IDFK... I always end up driving my significant other crazy starting about 6 months in, and by 18 they leave me, My current gf is a bit older at 42, with a 15 and 16 year old, of her own, ive been cased into a half ass father figure/older brother type of mold. I can tell im driving my girlfriend fucking nuts with my texts and shit, my talks, its like im never satisfied, im constantly bored, and always looking for a thrill... IS there someone, anyone out there with this bullshit that has found ANYTHING that gives them some fucking peace in there head/life? I would really love to pick your brain, cause this shit has been going on way to long, I dont have money for doctors, or meds, (or much of anything, hence why i grow) but i seriously would like to get this crap the fuck out of my head, it makes me miserable!
I have a hatred of being normal (a sheep), A constant NEED to be successful at least to my own warped standards, two kids (non biological) i have to deal with that will never look to me for anything and could care less, and one (pending dna test "10 month old") that i might have to be a part of that was a fling i had with a bitch when a mutual friend died, and we fucked for a couple weeks, and blah blah long story short, it "might" be mine, and i think shes a slut, but that doesn't matter, also wished death on her fucking ass cause shes a manipulative, self absorbed, non trusting thunder cunt, long story short, i need an answer, either something to read, a drug to take, something. Cause my mind might as well be a fucking warzone.
fuck! - the snake
I have a hatred of being normal (a sheep), A constant NEED to be successful at least to my own warped standards, two kids (non biological) i have to deal with that will never look to me for anything and could care less, and one (pending dna test "10 month old") that i might have to be a part of that was a fling i had with a bitch when a mutual friend died, and we fucked for a couple weeks, and blah blah long story short, it "might" be mine, and i think shes a slut, but that doesn't matter, also wished death on her fucking ass cause shes a manipulative, self absorbed, non trusting thunder cunt, long story short, i need an answer, either something to read, a drug to take, something. Cause my mind might as well be a fucking warzone.
fuck! - the snake
