You know this is a good point to give perspective. While reading through Daniels thread, I noticed he took one post to introduce himself and current life situation and it definitely made me appreciate who he is and what he's about.
I used to be purely a rec smoker and would have an 1/8 on hand here and there but nothing long term. In October 2009 I received my CAMMJ recommendation.
In 2004 I was diagnosed with clinical depression and take a medium dose of Zoloft for "mental balance". In June 2009 I was diagnosed with Seronegative Synovitus which has now been rediagnosed as Schleraderma (new Dr.). Within 1 month of receiving my recommendation and using mostly Indica strains, my CRP dropped from 23 to 9 (normal is 2 to 3). C-Reactive Protien is one of the measures of the level of inflamation in the body. MJ has also aleviated the irritation and itchiness of my skin (Schleraderma translates to "hard skin"). Over the long term the skin on my calves has "softened", isn't so shiny (think stretched balloon) and has hair growing again which I am attributing to MJ! Unfortunately, Indica strains wasn't all that great for my depression. But learning more about MJ, I've switched to using hybrids and like most of you, have figured out how it all works; Indicas at night before bed, hybrids in the morning and through the day, mix a bit of Sativa and Indica strains (in the bowl) for early evening. I actually find myself monitoring how much I smoke daily and know just how much to bring along during the day. Mostly I use .5 to .75 grams per day and mostly use a VaporGenie (my whip vaporizor bit the dust) portable vaporizer. I love the taste of the vapors over smoke! But every once in awhile, I pull out the bong to get a really good rip!!
So let me run through the "not so positives" of life starting with the most recent (not counting my woes with the plants):
* Kidney stone - went to ER for Extreme Pain and I am the proud father of a 6.7mm x 3mm stone which is now blocking my left kidney (hey God gave us two for a reason). The average kidney stone is 1 - 3mm and 5mm is where it becomes iffy whether you will pass it or not. Waiting for insurance to approve the surgical procedure before HMO will schedule surgury, probably a month away.
* The tip of my thumb - already showed you the pics of that
* House AC stopped working, do I spend $$'s to fix or $$'s to keep working on cab?
* Backyard being flooded daily. Discover it's the neighbors sprinkler busted under ground and flowing under my foundation! Took 2 weeks to figure it out and I thought I had a leak in my house. Yeah this one had a happy ending, but I still dug up 2 cubic yards of dirt trying to figure it all out!!
* Company switched Health Plans after being with the same Dr.s for 15 years. It's not very fun trying to get a new Psychiatrist all caught up with your life (I'm on my 3rd because I couldn't click with the first two). First one wanted me to stop taking "street drugs". UGH!! Also it took over two month to get my first appt with a Rheumatologist. SHEESH, the American Healthcare system is fucked. Kaiser was such a "happy" place and one stop shop!
* 6 All-nighters at work in the last 4 months managing a sick network.
* Up to 2 months ago, working 60 - 70 hours weeks. That had to stop!!
* Receive a 2 on my last review and put on 6 month probation!!! I've worked for this company for 20 years, built all of their systems from the ground up, work maddening hours, and WTF? There is no backup person for me at work and their motto of "doing more with less" is getting tiresome.
* I have teenage girls..........DRAMA CITY!!! I never knew there was so much stress with this age!!! Okay again not so bad 'cause I love them dearly!
I've been off my Zoloft for the past 2 months (while trying to get Dr's straight) so not only has certain parts of life actually "sucked" for me, they feel a bit more pronounced and I start getting that paranoid feeling. The worst part for me is the loss of motivation. To keep myself working on my cabinet, updating my journal has been more of a struggle. To know how I feel is to watch those commercials "Who does depression hurt...everybody." You know life sucks when you have to talk yourself into doing fun things, like 4th of July fireworks!
I will say that MJ helps a LOT, but it's not 100%. Everything has to stay in balance including sleep, nutrition, excercise. But even then, I still need medication.
Anyways, I hope after reading this that none of you need to go out and take a few Paxils. Like my last therapist kept telling me, "Only worry about the things that you have control over...the rest of the shit is just noise so let it go."
Peace and good feeling everybody!!