@Chunky Stool
Missed a lot of posts, but caught a few.
You said that he came at your wife, was she pulling on he neck? I think when my dog was young they would drag him by the neck n lock him in a cage when they didn’t want him around. Pulling on his neck or trying to force his body, is a instant trigger , that brings out fear aggression. Could be similar
He will bully as long as he’s trying to figure out his place in the pack, he wants to be the alpha, and will push the limits trying to get it.
You have to make sure he sees you in this role. Then he’ll try for 2nd , make sure he knows your wife is 2nd . You need to back her up . For a bit , try feed you & the wife 1st , then him, the higher you are in the pack the sooner you eat.