What did you accomplish today?

WeedFreak78

WeedFreak78

Well-Known Member
Bob Zmuda said:
Fire alarm/evacuation at work today because some dumb motherfucker tried to make TOAST.
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We had a guy make microwave popcorn once, accidentally set it for 30:00 mins instead of 3:00 mins, then walked away. Our cafeteria was a fishbowl, glass on all sides. Filled up with smoke within about 30 seconds of it starting to burn. Instead of turning on the vents in the cafeteria, the idiot decided to open all the doors and filled our building with burnt popcorn smoke, forcing an evacuation. It smelled like that for a week.
 
Bareback

Bareback

Well-Known Member
Indacouch said:
So an older lady who loves my banana OG tomatoes came by to swoop some .....she's disabled and has been out for two days due to vacation .....she text and asked if she could swing by ....I'm up so I said ....fuck no you crazy bitch..kiss my ass .....not really but now I have your attention .....so I said ya sure....so I'm masterba....umb...doing paperwork in my office when she texts and says she's here ....so I walk out my side door to meet her out front ......these fucking possums have ruined another pair of my underwear ....scared me again ....fuckin things ....walking down the side of the house towards the front ...and as soon as the motion light clicked ....BAM!!! Cluster fuck of possums rite next to me going crazy ...especially momma possum ((UGLY)) and hissed when I startled her .......thought the devil was in my yard .....I almost got a video of her rounding up the small ones and heading out .....but I had shit my pants and by the time it got my phone she was gone .......I will get a pic of that dirty snaggle toothed bitch on my phone ......maybe even the possums to ...((couldn't resist))


K time to get stoned and sleep




BACON PENIS !!!!!

Nite guys/gals

And fuck rats

8================D
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Your is their home if you don't relocate them they'll be there forever. Just grab her by the pussy ( I meant tale , yeah you don't want to mix that up ) when you feel her pull move the other way or use a live trap .
Good luck
 
Nugachino

Nugachino

Well-Known Member
WeedFreak78 said:
We had a guy make microwave popcorn once, accidentally set it for 30:00 mins instead of 3:00 mins, then walked away. Our cafeteria was a fishbowl, glass on all sides. Filled up with smoke within about 30 seconds of it starting to burn. Instead of turning on the vents in the cafeteria, the idiot decided to open all the doors and filled our building with burnt popcorn smoke, forcing an evacuation. It smelled like that for a week.
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I did a dumb one morning. I slept in on a work day. And just about shat the bed as I woke up to my final alarm.

I dashed out of bed. Slapped on clothes in the kitchen roughly. Half boiled the kettle. Made a half tide- half warm coffee. Dropped in some bread for toast.

Decided the quickest food I could do without bringing too many containers was eggs. So I slightly cracked the shells of 3 eggs. Chucked them in the microwave for 2.5 minutes..... And next minute, BOOM!

I just about shit myself again. I'm now wearing my coffee and have fucken egg bits all up my front. The room smells like curried egg. And I'm staring at the spot where my eggs used to be.

I must not have cracked the membrane on all of them. Because they blew the bloody microwave door open. And I had to pick egg out of my hair all day.
 
Bareback

Bareback

Well-Known Member
Nugachino said:
I did a dumb one morning. I slept in on a work day. And just about shat the bed as I woke up to my final alarm.

I dashed out of bed. Slapped on clothes in the kitchen roughly. Half boiled the kettle. Made a half tide- half warm coffee. Dropped in some bread for toast.

Decided the quickest food I could do without bringing too many containers was eggs. So I slightly cracked the shells of 3 eggs. Chucked them in the microwave for 2.5 minutes..... And next minute, BOOM!

I just about shit myself again. I'm now wearing my coffee and have fucken egg bits all up my front. The room smells like curried egg. And I'm staring at the spot where my eggs used to be.

I must not have cracked the membrane on all of them. Because they blew the bloody microwave door open. And I had to pick egg out of my hair all day.
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That way they call it Monday ( not saying it was Monday )
 
curious2garden

curious2garden

Well-Known Mod
Staff member
WeedFreak78 said:
We had a guy make microwave popcorn once, accidentally set it for 30:00 mins instead of 3:00 mins, then walked away. Our cafeteria was a fishbowl, glass on all sides. Filled up with smoke within about 30 seconds of it starting to burn. Instead of turning on the vents in the cafeteria, the idiot decided to open all the doors and filled our building with burnt popcorn smoke, forcing an evacuation. It smelled like that for a week.
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LOL sharing is caring.
 
Nugachino

Nugachino

Well-Known Member
Funnily enough. Yes. My brain decided it was going to go back to sleep. And flipped the auto pilot switch. Unfortunately. Auto pilot isn't equipped with suitable logic processors. And has tendency to let me do stupid shit. Like attempt to weaponize chook eggs for lunch.
 
Indacouch

Indacouch

Well-Known Member
Bareback said:
Your is their home if you don't relocate them they'll be there forever. Just grab her by the pussy ( I meant tale , yeah you don't want to mix that up ) when you feel her pull move the other way or use a live trap .
Good luck
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I don't mind having them around ....I already have to keep my dogs food in a metal trash can with a locking lid because of coons. I do set cheap dog food out for the big racoon me and my boy call Hamburglar for obvious reasons .....but that's far away from the house.......this momma possum is getting into my recycle bags of soda cans to lick the tops .....I don't want to kill her or nothing but I may have to punch in the vagina and bite her ear off to let her know I'm hardcore and crazy ......or kidnap one of her kids ........most likely I will have to trap her and or find a way to scare her when she's close to the house so she knows it's dangerous ....will see .....they're visiting every night now though .....
 
GreatwhiteNorth

GreatwhiteNorth

Global Moderator
Staff member
Indacouch said:
I don't mind having them around ....I already have to keep my dogs food in a metal trash can with a locking lid because of coons. I do set cheap dog food out for the big racoon me and my boy call Hamburglar for obvious reasons .....but that's far away from the house.......this momma possum is getting into my recycle bags of soda cans to lick the tops .....I don't want to kill her or nothing but I may have to punch in the vagina and bite her ear off to let her know I'm hardcore and crazy ......or kidnap one of her kids ........most likely I will have to trap her and or find a way to scare her when she's close to the house so she knows it's dangerous ....will see .....they're visiting every night now though .....
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I'd re-think relocating them versus securing the recycling better - here's a tidbit I had no clue of up until a couple of months ago.
"Extrapolating from their findings, Ostfeld said, the team estimated that in one season, an opossum can kill about 5,000 ticks."

http://www.caryinstitute.org/newsroom/opossums-killers-ticks
 
Indacouch

Indacouch

Well-Known Member
GreatwhiteNorth said:
I'd re-think relocating them versus securing the recycling better - here's a tidbit I had no clue of up until a couple of months ago.
"Extrapolating from their findings, Ostfeld said, the team estimated that in one season, an opossum can kill about 5,000 ticks."

http://www.caryinstitute.org/newsroom/opossums-killers-ticks
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I don't mind having them around ....just gotta bin my recyclables better.....there use to be lots of animals around including fox ......so it's nice to see the coons and possums around.......maybe il just set some food out in the barn where she's staying with the little ones ....maybe that will keep te mischief down to a minimum ....I still think there ugly as sin .........I already checked all my outside vents in the eves to make sure they don't end up in the roof/attic ......il try to get a pic of the family next time I see em
 
Bareback

Bareback

Well-Known Member
GreatwhiteNorth said:
I'd re-think relocating them versus securing the recycling better - here's a tidbit I had no clue of up until a couple of months ago.
"Extrapolating from their findings, Ostfeld said, the team estimated that in one season, an opossum can kill about 5,000 ticks."

http://www.caryinstitute.org/newsroom/opossums-killers-ticks
Click to expand...
This is good to know, I was totally unaware that they ate ticks.

I have a 3 acre pond on the property and we have coons , possums, deer, rabbit ...... all the woodland critters. But I had no idea that possum had a virtue.

Indacouch said:
I don't mind having them around ....I already have to keep my dogs food in a metal trash can with a locking lid because of coons. I do set cheap dog food out for the big racoon me and my boy call Hamburglar for obvious reasons .....but that's far away from the house.......this momma possum is getting into my recycle bags of soda cans to lick the tops .....I don't want to kill her or nothing but I may have to punch in the vagina and bite her ear off to let her know I'm hardcore and crazy ......or kidnap one of her kids ........most likely I will have to trap her and or find a way to scare her when she's close to the house so she knows it's dangerous ....will see .....they're visiting every night now though .....
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Yeah I wasn't saying shoot them , that's just mean. So you think she is addicted to coke hmmm. It wouldn't be the first snaggletooth bitch I seen addicted to it.
I use to cut grass for an old lady back in the seventies that kelp cases of drinks in her garage and sometimes they would be five or six laying round
with tiny holes on both sides, I wish I could have seen the bite/ spray .
 
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