Pointless or poorly reported news stories on the national news

Unclebaldrick

Well-Known Member
I watch the news most evenings. Not only because of my advanced age but also because I consider it a useful place to observe the decline of Western civilization.

Believe it or not, the news was once not chosen by the videos submitted by drooling idiots from their iPhones.

Let me give the latest example... Tonight, the ABC news reported on a baby that was expected to be a girl (from the ultrasound) but was actually born...... (drumroll) a boy! Why was this mind numbingly stupid shit reported on? Because the producers thought that the video of grandma being surprised by this kid's dick was too priceless for us not to see. "That sonogram operator is going to have some explaining to do." the idiot newsman says.

On my "most egregious" list of fucked up reporting was when the simpering fool of a newscaster was trying to report on a cod fishing ban. The actual news story was just that - cod fishing is banned on the New England coast. But they couldn't just say that, they had to use George fucking Clooney to make the story relevant to the imbeciles at home. I swear, it went like this; "we all remember George Clooney playing the quintessential fisherman in "The Perfect Storm" (still picture of Clooney in The Perfect Storm). Find out why fisherman like him are upset tonight - after the break.". After the break, the news opens with a climactic scene from "The Perfect Storm" - Clooney fighting giant waves. After the clip is finished the newsman mentions that cod fishing is banned in the Gulf of Maine.

Oh I miss real news. We are all doomed you know.
 
Last edited:

mainliner

Well-Known Member
the worlds so massive and so many of the same problems news becomes seasonal. ..... This month dog attacks next month avalanches month after that yeti siteings ............ A then it starts again




i don't watch the news or read newspapers........ Their had to find living under a bridge :(
 

Pinworm

Well-Known Member
I watch the news most evenings. Not only because of my advanced age but also because I consider it a useful place to observe the decline of Western civilization.

Believe it or not, the news was once not chosen by the videos submitted by drooling idiots from their iPhones.

Let me give the latest example... Tonight, the CBS news reported on a baby that was expected to be a girl (from the ultrasound) but was actually born...... (drumroll) a boy! Why was this mind numbingly stupid shit reported on? Because the producers thought that the video of grandma being surprised by this kid's dick was too priceless for us not to see. "That sonogram operator is going to have some explaining to do." the idiot newsman says.

On my "most egregious" list of fucked up reporting was when the simpering fool of a newscaster was trying to report on a cod fishing ban. The actual news story was just that - cod fishing is banned on the New England coast. But they couldn't just say that, they had to use George fucking Clooney to make the story relevant to the imbeciles at home. I swear, it went like this; "we all remember George Clooney playing the quintessential fisherman in "The Perfect Storm" (still picture of Clooney in The Perfect Storm). Find out why fisherman like him are upset tonight - after the break.". After the break, the news opens with a climactic scene from "The Perfect Storm" - Clooney fighting giant waves. After the clip is finished the newsman mentions that cod fishing is banned in the Gulf of Maine.

Oh I miss real news. We are all doomed you know.
I remember when you used to get the morning news, and the 5'oclock evening news and that was it. 24 hour news cycle destroyed journalism. To fill up a whole 24 hour block, CNN, BBC, Faux, MSNBC need to have something to talk about ALL the time. At their worst, they blow up issues with no relevance or importance into sensationalist bullshit that's designed to get a reaction from their viewers. It's garbage.
 

Unclebaldrick

Well-Known Member
the worlds so massive and so many of the same problems news becomes seasonal. ..... This month dog attacks next month avalanches month after that yeti siteings ............ A then it starts again




i don't watch the news or read newspapers........ Their had to find living under a bridge :(
Dude. Shut the fuck up. You are like the inevitable asshole who goes into a thread about a tv show to tell us all that they don't have a tv.
 

Singlemalt

Well-Known Member
I watch the news most evenings. Not only because of my advanced age but also because I consider it a useful place to observe the decline of Western civilization.

Believe it or not, the news was once not chosen by the videos submitted by drooling idiots from their iPhones.

Let me give the latest example... Tonight, the ABC news reported on a baby that was expected to be a girl (from the ultrasound) but was actually born...... (drumroll) a boy! Why was this mind numbingly stupid shit reported on? Because the producers thought that the video of grandma being surprised by this kid's dick was too priceless for us not to see. "That sonogram operator is going to have some explaining to do." the idiot newsman says.

On my "most egregious" list of fucked up reporting was when the simpering fool of a newscaster was trying to report on a cod fishing ban. The actual news story was just that - cod fishing is banned on the New England coast. But they couldn't just say that, they had to use George fucking Clooney to make the story relevant to the imbeciles at home. I swear, it went like this; "we all remember George Clooney playing the quintessential fisherman in "The Perfect Storm" (still picture of Clooney in The Perfect Storm). Find out why fisherman like him are upset tonight - after the break.". After the break, the news opens with a climactic scene from "The Perfect Storm" - Clooney fighting giant waves. After the clip is finished the newsman mentions that cod fishing is banned in the Gulf of Maine.

Oh I miss real news. We are all doomed you know.
Magnificent rant! ++rep.
You do know that the news producer who edited in the Perfect Storm garbage prolly received a TV news award and has Hollywood aspirations
 

Unclebaldrick

Well-Known Member
We were doomed at least 10 yrs prior to the vile K clan. I reckon it to the onset of reality TV
I don't think it was tv - in a sense. Think of "the old days", the really old ones. I think that early television was a pretty highbrow affair. Almost nobody showed up on tv without a dress or jacket. Jack Parr got fired for saying "water closet".

I think that they held television up to a standard and that tradition held this standard up for some time. Yeah, reality tv may be responsible for teaching the producers that they could be doing a whole lot less, but the fault is really ours. I can't escape thinking about what Warhol said about the future - everybody famous for ten minutes.
 
Top