What do you do when you know your gonna get laid that night?

[Yessica...]

Well - my LAST "first time" with someone was about 2 years ago.

1. get all hair forcibly removed via hot wax and pain from anywhere south of the equator.
2. haircut, and make the hairs all pretty-like
3. set the make-up gun to whore
3. New pretty dress, and DEF matching undergarments.

Now - I wear my PJ's and all I have to do is touch IT. Pretty handie (pun intended) having one of you dinks around on a regular basis.

Oh, and I lurb my particular dink. Super gay, I know...

 

[Dyna Ryda]

I make padawanbater shave his asshole. I don't like the ruff feeling when I'm pounding his butthole.

 

[Skuxx]

 

[doublejj]

A 40 year old man should be aloud 2 of those 20 year old babe, then 3 when he reach 60

 

[Singlemalt]

Well - my LAST "first time" with someone was about 2 years ago.

1. get all hair forcibly removed via hot wax and pain from anywhere south of the equator.
2. haircut, and make the hairs all pretty-like
3. set the make-up gun to whore
3. New pretty dress, and DEF matching undergarments.

Now - I wear my PJ's and all I have to do is touch IT. Pretty handie (pun intended) having one of you dinks around on a regular basis.

Oh, and I lurb my particular dink. Super gay, I know...

Why bother with undergarments? ...... unless they are edible and chorizo flavored

 

[bu$hleaguer]

I make padawanbater shave his asshole. I don't like the ruff feeling when I'm pounding his butthole.

You guys don't kiss on the mouth, do ya? Cause that's fuckin gay if you do.

 

[Singlemalt]

 

[Unclebaldrick]

I make padawanbater shave his asshole. I don't like the ruff feeling when I'm pounding his butthole.

Second sentance unnecessary. We knew what you meant.

 

[Dyna Ryda]

You guys don't kiss on the mouth, do ya? Cause that's fuckin gay if you do.

He tried once but I'm not into that. I'm not gay.

 

[Dyna Ryda]

Second sentance unnecessary. We knew what you meant.

I'm not sure, there are some really stupid people on this forum.

 

[anzohaze]

I make sure the parts are clean shaven and that I put in the "special" Prince Albert horseshoe with the oversized 7/16 balls. Its either that or explain the extra 4 gage hole in the head of my dick.

Why do you jeed the bigger balls is it so she sctually feels something hahaha

 

[Hookabelly]

3. set the make-up gun to whore
.

The best…. LOL LOL

I've gotta update my makeup gun. Mine only goes to slutty.

 

[Yessica...]

The best…. LOL LOL

I've gotta update my makeup gun. Mine only goes to slutty.

 

[pinkjackyle]

i just go to the barn and find a purty one it aint so baaaaaaaaad .

 

[KLITE]

I buy the lucky lady a vacuum cleaner, chicks LOVE vacuum cleaners.

 

[NoSwagBag]

View attachment 3222976

Lmao

 

[NoSwagBag]

Give her another glass (or three) of wine so shit gets super crazy!

 

[lahadaextranjera]

I buy the lucky lady a vacuum cleaner, chicks LOVE vacuum cleaners.

Omg! He bought me a Hoover recently because mine broke. I love it! Spot on there!

I knew from that point on it was lurve..

 

[Dyna Ryda]

Omg! He bought me a Hoover recently because mine broke. I love it! Spot on there!

I knew from that point on it was lurve..

You deserve a dyson, hoovers are cheap

 

[lahadaextranjera]

You deserve a dyson, hoovers are cheap

Oh well, in that case maybe it isn't 'lurve'!!

No, Hoover are British and I used to drive past the old Hoover building on the A40. It's tradition don't you know.
"I'm doing the hoovering"
"I'm Dysoning" you see? Just not the same.