That Guy who smokes your dope and say's it's OK, but had better.

Prefontaine said:

LOl, your such a dick dude, hahahahahaha, huge raging asshole, hahahahahahaha oh god, *slaps knee, here hit this, hahahahahahahaha

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oh no not that side, thats the ASS end , hahahahahahaha

that's GOLD

Good work i used to have a friend of sorts who would become a really annoying tosser when there was smoke around, "i'm so high i'm so high oh y god i'm so high right now" non-stop. So the UK being the UK and joints having tobacco in them, i just rolled up a joint with gaps with no weed in it, i'd smoke the stuff with the eweed, and pass him essentially a cigarette, he was a twat enough that he'd still carry on with the OMG i'm so high right now. Bit of a plonker. Never made him smoke shit though.

Wicked evil dude! Funny as hell though.

I have this friend that is just a total critic about weed, but in a negative way where other shit he had or could get was better, never giving you props on yours when he knows it's good. Last year I had just finished up a batch of Haze-types outside, beside some stanky indicas, and brought the stash over to smoke with friends. I started out with the indicas, and sure enough old iron lung sucked down a bong bowl in record time with the same response: good but not great. Well, I had expected this and made some nice hand rubbed hash with the trim off of the Hazes which I proceeded to generously mix into a packed bowl, knowing most of my friends have no tolerance for 14 week flowering, outdoor Sativas or think they do. I sat down next to him and told him to try this shit to see what he thinks, so he took a few giant rips, coughed his ass off for a few minutes, then as we chatted he finished it off. I asked him what he thought, got the usual response, then 20 minutes in he just shut up. Ten after that he was totally freaking out, red faced, asking what was in that shit, and pacing back and forth like a greyhound. We all laughed our asses off and fucked with him for an hour after that, joking about the cops being outside, etc. Ever since then he is very careful to ask what strain is in any bowl I hand him!

Peace!

SB

[video=youtube;z7zwJlgCDOo]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z7zwJlgCDOo[/video]

I got a belly full of white dog crap, and now you lay this shit on me?

Hepheastus420 said:

Ok when I first read that I was like damn that's fucked up, but now I can't stop laughing, ha.

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i had to do it because he threw something at my balls,so i was like ima get this mofo when he least expects it lol.
Heres some guy on youtube,it way more funny in person though.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PbOYE4G7HnA

CR500ROOST said:

i had to do it because he threw something at my balls,so i was like ima get this mofo when he least expects it lol.

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Once upon a time there was this 18 yr old boy serving time in a Young Offenders Institution. In this YO the screws used to hold the phone-cards, due to all the trouble they would cause amongst the inmates.
This boy's phone-cards kept going missing. In this boy's opinion, a certain screw that took a dislike to him was giving his phone-cards to another inmate.
Feeling frustrated at the fact that there wasn't really anything the boy could do about it, and with him working in the kitchens at the time, he decided to cum into a ball of bread, throw it into the mixer with the rest of the bread, and give it to all the inmates and all the screws. Thereby getting whichever screw and inmate were fucking with him.

woodsmaneh! said:

So I have this guy he's not a friend but his sister married my wifes brother so he's at all the family stuff. It does not matter what you smoke he's had better, and he never has anything to smoke. He a mooch, so at Christmas were at his sisters for a family do and I decide to see just what a bullshitter he is. My neice has a gerbil so I go and collect all the gerbil shit in the cage and press it into a ball put it into some tinfoil and wait. So he shows up and starts shooting his mouth off I pull out my bonk and put some hash in and suck it all up. Open the foil and put some gerbil shit in pass the bong to him and he sucks it all up holds it, big exhale that smelled like someone farted and says, not bad. I had to leave the room, LOL so hard I pissed my pants a bit. I told my wife and a couple of other friends.

Anyone ever do a crazy thing like that.

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I've never been that funny, but very close

so i had an associate not a friend he was really just a wanna be dick thinks hes smoked every strain and what not so i decided to put him to the test i was having spots one time and i only had roaches so i broke them open and smoked what was in them and gave hi the roach papers haha he didn't even noticed he didn't cough said they were good so i thought fuck it and pulled out a dead fly and drove it to him and to my surprise the poor bastard took it all ... i wander if he knows yet?

Airwave said:

Once upon a time there was this 18 yr old boy serving time in a Young Offenders Institution. In this YO the screws used to hold the phone-cards, due to all the trouble they would cause amongst the inmates.
This boy's phone-cards kept going missing. In this boy's opinion, a certain screw that took a dislike to him was giving his phone-cards to another inmate.
Feeling frustrated at the fact that there wasn't really anything the boy could do about it, and with him working in the kitchens at the time, he decided to cum into a ball of bread, throw it into the mixer with the rest of the bread, and give it to all the inmates and all the screws. Thereby getting whichever screw and inmate were fucking with him.

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nut bread ........

420keepitgreen420 said:

so i had an associate not a friend he was really just a wanna be dick thinks hes smoked every strain and what not so i decided to put him to the test i was having spots one time and i only had roaches so i broke them open and smoked what was in them and gave hi the roach papers haha he didn't even noticed he didn't cough said they were good so i thought fuck it and pulled out a dead fly and drove it to him and to my surprise the poor bastard took it all ... i wander if he knows yet?

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Ew... I'm all for smoking roaches but you just gave him nasty tarred paper? Wow! I am feeling so guilty being amused by this idea...

thats awesome... haha did he ask for another hit?

My old man was pissed off so his bro , my uncle said here light this up youll feel better . It was some heavy skunk all sticky and a little wet but still smokeable . So he lights it gets a good hit and cant get it to smoke anymore . He keeps trying to light it , the thing is half left and still he cant get another hit off it . So he throws it down on the table and says I wish you never gave me that joint . Then storms out . We still laugh about that time .

Funny thread, hilarious OP. I wish you would have sold him what was left, adding insult to injury. Great story.

Haha this made me lol so hard. Would of loved being there to lol with you.

Knew a cat in highschool that was pissed at a moochy type, He couldnt roll so my boy rolled him a blunt of the kids weed and slipped a chunk of cat turd in the tip.....Dont fully remember what happened after that..ha

I nearly shat myself OP. Anyway, this isn't really weed related and might not even be relevant to the original post but this thread reminded me of it. Once in high school this scalawag slag of a bitch incessantly kept fucking with my lock on my locker by doing things like putting lip gloss all over it, making it hard to turn the dial, and putting nasty used chewing gum all over the thing. I had finally had enough and resolved to end this trifling kiddie bullshit. I created a master plan to note where her locker was and my best friend and I shaved out pube and butt hairs (we both coincidentally had ferocious muffs at the time) and bought some krazy glue (super adhesive) and took the nasty pile to school after class hours. We then glued the foul hairy mess onto that chimpanzee's lock and couldn't wait to see her face the next morning... the anticipation was like being a little kid on christmas eve, I almost couldnt sleep. The next day she was appalled and the thing looked like some kind of alien rodent. The janitor, poor guy, had to cut the lock off with bolt cutters. Needless to say, my locker was never fucked with again.

Actually just a few days ago a buddie of mine came over to get a bag off me, and after he had a seat I broke out my white widow, and he was like.. Dude it just dosent look that good, has that home grown look, my girl busted out laughing like are you fucking kidding me? All you get is what your boy call skunk but has more seeds than actual bud... It really really pissed me off man, I know im no a pro or anything buthe only gets mids and I was doing him a favor

My one new thought. If you don't want people saying they've smoked better don't proclaim that it is fire, bomb, top shelf, best ever and all that nonsense beforehand. If someone sais how wss that weed i say great, if someone sais it's the nicest kush you'll find, i'll tell them how it really is

that. is. fucking. brilliant.. i could never take dude seriously again

next time he mooches off you and says - its good, but ive had better - say - yeah you really seemed to like that gerbil shit from last month huh? too bad im all out.. just cleaned the cage lastnight lol

or never let him hit your stash again.. kinda dickish
then again he is family (kinda)