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Twas the night before Christmas and all thru the house. Pinworm sat at his computer he still uses a mouse. He fired up his bong it's smoke filled the air the smoke detector went off he didn't even care. There was a knock at his door he sprung into action . He didn't get paranoid it was his...

Check out les Leopold. Read what he has to say.

I always liked spending time away from the kids the house the bills and all the worries of life with my wife . I think a nice weekend trip would be a great gift if money and time allow ! I'm sure he'll enjoy whatever you decide Merry Christmas !

Had he only took the time to ask us about the hoovering helicopters. We could have laid to rest any of his fears and had some fun as well. Way to go Jasper.

I dated my wife's sister . I had my 15 minutes of fame the day I was born in 1958 being the first baby born that year . I once took a test drive and kept the car for 2 weeks before calling the dealership and telling them where they could find the car !

Life can't keep an old goat down ! Homebrew and homegrown don't sound half bad ! Hey if life gives you lemons.....drink lemon flavoured homebrew and smoke some lemon skunk homegrown!

My granddaughter who is almost 4 has returned to me the enjoyment of Christmas. The excitement I see in her eyes as she looks at the tree and all the decorations plus this year old Santa will make a debut can't let this white beard go to waste . I've been growing it for almost a year ! Ho Ho Ho...

Bob Marley !

Just watch a few episodes of Cops and you'll find out what not to do.....I saw an episode several years back and this Boston cop stuck half his arm down this kids throat to retrieve a dime bag he saw him swallow......learn how to make edibles !

"Hey is that Osama"?

I'm just an old country boy who doesn't concern himself with what may be . For now I'm here in this moment. When my time on this world comes to an end that's when I'll find out what comes next ! Maybe I'll be aware from whence I came or will know where I'm headed or perhaps there's nothing. One...

I'm completely up front with the people who wait on me right from the start. By that I mean...I tell them that I tip well (and I do) and if my service is outstanding their tip will reflect that. I have no problem paying for outstanding service and on the flipside I have no problem going to...

No matter how terrible you think things are....There's always someone that has it worse than you. I deliver newspapers for a living and the holiday season is big for us with tips. What I do is send all my customers a little letter telling them that I would prefer that they donate any money that...

Sorry to hear about the wife. You do indeed have something to be thankful for my friend ! Enjoy the turkey sandwich , pie and whisky .

I'm hearing that the Panthers are underdogs. Cowboys are favored by 2. But I'm still going with the Panthers Romo or not !

Nice I like fine watches too. But for me I'd like Santa to get the local boys in blue to return my &#$,*%€¥£ LED lights that they confiscated back in July and send a very special present to the @$!#^*~¿ neighbor that just couldn't mind his own business that would make for a holly jolly Christmas !

Yep, I guess they'll keep sending me back till I get it right. But at least this time they've allowed me access to this strange place. Where you have people on the left. People on the right people in the middle. Know it all's and probably one of the worse misuses of a skin suit that I've ever...

It was mandated by the intergalactic judicial system as a part of my relocation to this solar system .

Yeah, all is well. Finally got all my legal woes behind me and satisfied the NC tax people. In total I paid 7K . Now I'm ready to get back at it but this time Oldtimer will have a top shelf odor control device of stellar proportion ! Hope you have a great thanksgiving my friend !

Mr.Odanksta try a strong soap it usually removes unwanted grime from my avi ! good luck