Apt Next Door Loves

ganjames

ganjames

Well-Known Member
When I was like 12 we had this old computer bass speaker in the basement and I took it up to my room and tried to fuck it.
It didn't fit, I was pretty pissed off about that...


...Still am.
 
ganjames

ganjames

Well-Known Member
It was fucked up too because those things are made out of plastic, so it's not like the hole is going to stretch.

And I'm up in my room with my pants off, spitting in this speaker hole, trying to coat in inside of the hole with my spit while evenly spreading it around with my fingers. So I'm basically finger fucking this bass speaker desperately trying to get my dick to fit inside of it.
 
tip top toker

tip top toker

Well-Known Member
rifk said:
*Calls 911*
"Hi it's 10am and I can hear my neighbor watching porn"
Click to expand...
You can get carted to jail for having sex too loud.. it's a perfectly valid noise complaint. but yes, one could imagine the initial reaction on the other end of the phoneline :D
 
neosapien

neosapien

Well-Known Member
ganjames said:
It was fucked up too because those things are made out of plastic, so it's not like the hole is going to stretch.

And I'm up in my room with my pants off, spitting in this speaker hole, trying to coat in inside of the hole with my spit while evenly spreading it around with my fingers. So I'm basically finger fucking this bass speaker desperately trying to get my dick to fit inside of it.
Click to expand...
lolololololololololol
 
F

fdd2blk

Well-Known Member
"hi, it's 8:30 am and i think my neighbor is hitting his girlfriend."

the cops will knock on his door. he will have to answer it and explain that he was simply watching porn. they will leave. he will turn it down.

or you could just kill him. :fire:
 
rocpilefsj

rocpilefsj

Misguided Angel
Or just leave him a friendly note: "I love jerkin it as much as the next guy, but come on... Show some discretion"
 
dank smoker420

dank smoker420

Well-Known Member
rocpilefsj said:
Or just leave him a friendly note: "I love jerkin it as much as the next guy, but come on... Show some discretion"
Click to expand...
hahaha i love this one this might be the winner!
to somone else that posted about him banging girls. he is not haha the sound changes every couple minutes and the voice of the moan haha or scream. if he was banging girls it was be insane cause it would be about 3 girls right at the same time haha and also the people above me bang every morning also but alteast i know its not porn haha just knowing its porn makes it worst and funnier
 
Finshaggy

Finshaggy

Well-Known Member
Call the police and tell them it sounds like a woman is getting hurt in the apartment next to you.
Make sure he's watchin something loud, when they bust down his door, and he's bustin a nut, I bet he turns the volume down. And never turns it up again.
 
Total Head

Total Head

Well-Known Member
"dear neighbor:
just because you masturbate all day does not mean all your neighbors want to hear your porn. turn it down, please. headphones are no longer a high ticket item."

lol

if you point out how creepy it is and he doesn't feel like a creep, then he IS a creep. make a plan b quick.
 
rocpilefsj

rocpilefsj

Misguided Angel
Total Head said:
"dear neighbor:
just because you masturbate all day does not mean all your neighbors want to hear your porn. turn it down, please. headphones are no longer a high ticket item."

lol

if you point out how creepy it is and he doesn't feel like a creep, then he IS a creep. make a plan b quick.
Click to expand...
Damn creepy sex addicts... It can never be a hot chick living next to you, it always has to be some creepy dude lol. Chances are if you can hear it, everyone else can too. Maybe even just mention it to the landlord, that way he can bring it up and you remain anonymous.
 
beardo

beardo

Well-Known Member
What about just loud masturbation without the porn ?
you guys all complaining if someones just beating it loudly?
 
dank smoker420

dank smoker420

Well-Known Member
i can stay anonymous cause the way the apts are set up there set up with 2-4-2 the two apts have there own hallway and then the 4 in the middle share a middle hallway. the guy is on a 2 and im in the middle. if i really wanted to completely stay out of it i could put your next door neighbroh haha but then it could make everything all weird for him
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top