I fucked up and got on match.com and my wife found out.

Flaming Pie

Flaming Pie

Well-Known Member
srh88 said:
what if she likes to watch it too?
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Then you both consent to it. That's your business if you are both like it's ok.

Most women don't like their men watching porn. Some accept it and still dislike it and some don't accept it at all.

I personally feel really bad if my hubby had to jack off. I feel like it is my responsibility to make sure he is emotionally and physically taken care of.
 
Aeroknow

Aeroknow

Well-Known Member
Flaming Pie said:
Then you both consent to it. That's your business if you are both like it's ok.

Most women don't like their men watching porn. Some accept it and still dislike it and some don't accept it at all.

I personally feel really bad if my hubby had to jack off. I feel like it is my responsibility to make sure he is emotionally and physically taken care of.
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Even if he told you he was thinking of you when he was doing it? You'd feel bad?
 
Flaming Pie

Flaming Pie

Well-Known Member
Kind Sir said:
Suggestions were too good to be male, shouldve known.
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I've been married 10 years and the first 2 years were hard. The next 3-6 were a struggle and then it started to smooth out.

The advice I gave on speaking from a place of respect and love is what worked the best.

No name calling, apologize if you do, try not shout, apologize if you do, take time to listen, say how it makes you feel. Try not assume what the other is thinking or ask what they meant or felt when they said something.

And so on. It's mostly an exercise in keeping calm so you can respond calmly.
 
Flaming Pie

Flaming Pie

Well-Known Member
Aeroknow said:
Even if he told you he was thinking of you when he was doing it? You'd feel bad?
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Yeah. I know that masterbating is not sex. It feels different and barely satisfies.
A spouse is supposed to take care of those needs.

I understand that sometimes it happens. I know it happened early in our marriage due to arguments and us being mad at eachother.

If we are living together and I am not sick or unavailable, I feel like it is my responsibility to take care of his needs just like it is his responsibility to take care of mine.
 
Aeroknow

Aeroknow

Well-Known Member
Flaming Pie said:
Yeah. I know that masterbating is not sex. It feels different and barely satisfies.
A spouse is supposed to take care of those needs.

I understand that sometimes it happens. I know it happened early in our marriage due to arguments and us being mad at eachother.

If we are living together and I am not sick or unavailable, I feel like it is my responsibility to take care of his needs just like it is his responsibility to take care of mine.
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Well you see, if i was with someone who was always ready to take care of my needs, i would hardly beat off too. Unfortunately most chicks i've been with, ESPECIALLY my exwife, get all weird once a month:-(
 
Flaming Pie

Flaming Pie

Well-Known Member
Aeroknow said:
Well you see, if i was with someone who was always ready to take care of my needs, i would hardly beat off too. Unfortunately most chicks i've been with, ESPECIALLY my exwife, get all weird once a month:-(
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Lol. Tell her to take a shower and if the bed gets messy you will clean it up. That might work.

Ibuprofen helps with cramps but sexual excitement and climax makes cramps go away completely for a bit.

She is either worried about messes or in pain or super tired.

Try this: have her take a shower and put in tampon. Do long foreplay with whatever usually excites her the most. Then remove tampon and continue until she is ready.

As long as it is not a heavy flow day, there shouldn't be much mess. Keep a towel nearby to make sure no mess comes out when you pull out.

Or just tell her to make it up for you the first day she is off her cycle.
 
v.s one

v.s one

Well-Known Member
Flaming Pie said:
She is scared she might lose you. That is why she freaked out. If you want her to stop freaking out you have to let her know that she is the most important person through actions and wordS.

Clean the house for her and sit her down and say, I would never leave you for a cheap fling. I love you. I'm sorry I scared you. You don't have to worry. I don't want anyone but you.

Then hug her for as long as she hugs you back. Take a couple days of asking her what she would like to do and make sure you NEVER join any kind of dating/sex site again.
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Thank you.
 
Flaming Pie

Flaming Pie

Well-Known Member
burrheadd said:
Takes to much effort. Sometimes you just wanna watch a little porn and rub one out
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That is selfish and will not lead to happiness.

A loving spouse should not view sex as too much effort. If you view it as such, the other spouse will sense it and feel unappreciated and unloved. Eventually they will resent you and leave you for someone who gives them the love they need.

If they do not leave and you still mistreat them, they will be miserable and make you miserable.

Love takes work. Good sex takes effort.

I hope you grow up and consider other people's needs before you find yourself alone.
 
burrheadd

burrheadd

Well-Known Member
Flaming Pie said:
That is selfish and will not lead to happiness.

A loving spouse should not view sex as too much effort. If you view it as such, the other spouse will sense it and feel unappreciated and unloved. Eventually they will resent you and leave you for someone who gives them the love they need.

If they do not leave and you still mistreat them, they will be miserable and make you miserable.

Love takes work. Good sex takes effort.

I hope you grow up and consider other people's needs before you find yourself alone.
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image.jpeg
 
Flaming Pie

Flaming Pie

Well-Known Member
burrheadd said:
View attachment 3589722
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Do you want a happy fulfilling marriage or just a roommate?

Marriage takes work. Imagine it is like a garden. More attention to the garden will produce a better crop.

To make sure a marriage grows to be healthy, you must feed it with love, kindness, consideration and respect. If neglected, your marriage bed will become full of resentment and bitterness. You need to take the time to tend to your marriage and remove the weeds that are choking out proper growth.
 
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