I first heard of this famous UK strain on the web site Breedbay. Seems it is all the rage in the UK among indoor growers. The general take among these growers was it was just about the best strain around there parts. Now my first thoughts were it was just another stinky cutting similar to many I have grown. But as I spoke to more and more growers from the UK I began to realize, maybe it was really special and unique after all! In the summer of 2007 I traveled to the Birmingham in the UK. The trip was pretty normal over all but when I landed in Gatwick Airport, the customs line was 12 rows wide and people were moving very slow, it took a full 2 hours to just clear the gate and make my way to baggage pick up. I always look for Bob as hes the taller of my two English buddies and I soon spotted both him and Pistils with huge Cheshire cat grins.
We make our way to the parking area and we head to the Blue zone where they had parked. The first thing I saw that proved people are totally alike everywhere was us not having a clue where the car was in the garage, sound familiar? We do this shit at home about 3 times a month…where the fuck did we park?
Pistils, Bob and I spent a week there seeing the sites meeting other growers and being treated basically like a King by these awesome people. They showed me many cool things about their area and it wasn’t long after landed the subject of cheese came up. So after a small walkabout we locate the ride and pile in. Bob hands me a Hemp Bong bag and Pistils a Stash Jar. Inside the bag was a Roor Bong with all the parts and a glass screen, inside the Jar was 4-6 Large JTR nugs cured to perfection grown by a friend of Pistils and just a killer sample. I felt like I was home with a brand new bong! Now riding with Bob is like going to the fair and riding a fast ride. He’s a trained ambulance driver and he fucking hauls ass! We were hitting 120 easy in places as I sat in the back seat smoking bingers out of the Roor, it wasn’t till later that I found out the zooming is just as big a fine as here and they don’t do bingers in cars, I have never been good at the following the rules thing….Thanks for making me feel like the King of Ganja guys. When you travel you always learn great new words. Now no one I met was nothing but nice but just like stateside the people around you can be annoying. The guy in front or your car going slow that wont get outa the way, The cook that drops his hair on ya food it truly was just like home but as we would call someone in our way an asshat ,Pistils shouts Move ya Cheeky Wankers, a more severe term is Knobhead and just cracked me up.
Lovely jubbley is a phase thats means Kick ass!
Mashed is stoned
No bongs Spliffs are the toke of the day
I absolutely smoked Cheese as everyone I met seemed to have a stash of this bud. I loved the fruity flavor and great head rush it is apparently really fucking good cause I smoked the stuff for 4 days and never took a picture of a bud. I forgot my cam battery BTW and we spent 3 hours driving to every store in Birmingham looking for a d-80 battery but we only incurred Knobheads and Wankers yet again.
I felt that we probably have similar strains already here in the US. Cheese isn't cheese like its just funky its similar to Tiny Bomb or a Funky fruity C99 but it also has a exotic spice undertone and a warm buttery toke. The exhale is spicy and smooth I smoked the same cut grown by many people and many ways and the flavor and strong smell was always there.
Lovely Jubbley!
This summer a friend, Obsoul33te from Northern California came to visit us. We spent a day swapping stories sharing bud and bubble and traded a few cuttings. He had some really nice gear in his stash but of all the stuff he offered the one I was interested in the most was Cheese. OB has some really good connections and if anyone has a real cutting of something it is him. The cutting was accompanied by some really large and dense buds that were grown outdoors and I must say my first impression was it was the same weird smell I remember from my trip, but these buds were huge compared to the buds I saw in England. Sunshine is much different than indoor lighting and some strains blow up under God’s light.
I planted the Cheese cutting in a 6” container and placed her in my vegging room under a 1000 watt Hortilux Blue Metal halide Bulb. These very expensive bulbs are designed to have enhanced Blue spectrum and I notice they produce shorter plants with thick stalks. I topped the Cheese cutting early to form multiple heads and continued to grow her under 18 hours of light and 6 hours of darkness until she formed a large dense bush.
She grew very similar to our Apollo-13 mother plant, mainly growing sideways and having very thin vine like stems. I supported her well with bamboo stakes and wire twist ties to keep the main buds from sagging below the canopy. She was a very squat plant and needed additional height to compete with some of my taller plants so she was placed on top of some bricks to even things out. Even still in veg you could smell her if you moved her or brushed up against the plant. A slightly rotting smell not quite Cheese but I understand why it got the name. At this early stage she reminded me or Port Wine Cheese spread.
The plant started to really fill out with buds by day 30 and my bud room took on a smell I had never encountered before. I was also running a new cutting of AK-47 that, combined with the funk of Cheese was overwhelming at times. It had a slightly Cherry smell but also a flat beer or garbage can smell that was gross and attractive at the same time. As the plant matured past day 45 I was worried I would not like the strain at all as it took on the smell of spoiled Vomit and fruit I could not imagine anything good coming from those smells.
By day 50 the rotting smell took a back seat to an astringent cleaning fruit smell if you actually smelled a bud but the odor it gave off in the room was a funky fruit/cheese smell.
I was having a hard time deciding when to harvest the plant as most of the pistils were shriveling up but many were still white in color so I contacted some UK growers and they informed me I was looking at 56 days for maximum flavor and smoothness so that’s the day I harvested her. The plant may not have looked huge but as a whole it had a tremendous number of bud sites and each nugget was hard and filled out completely. I could not help but notice a hanger of Cheese colas weighed as much as the huge hanger of AK buds harvested the same day. There was just twice as many rock hard buds on the Cheese hanger and it made up for the huge size of the AK-47.
I trimmed each bud well to collect as much sugar leaf as possible to make some Cheese bubblehash later. I was able to fill 4 clothes hangers with buds from the one plant and since it roots so easy I already have another Cheese plant 36” tall to place in the bud room.
We allowed the buds to hang and dry completely in 7 days and then I removed them from the stem and placed into a aluminum trey to finish air drying. When the stem was crunchy I placed the buds in an open jar and into my stash cabinet. After a few days I placed a lid on and we waited for these already incredibly pungent buds to cure for several weeks. This will allow us to do a proper judging as Cured Bud is the best tasting and has a better high.
We waited 2 weeks before opening the jar again and the smell is really amazing. It is also very hard to describe. Slightly fruity with a complex astringent or some type of disinfecting cleaner, the cheese smell only occurs when smelling it from a distance or in bulk. When you actually shove a bud under your nose and sniff the smell is much more than just Cheesy! The sample bud is crunchy and crisp with just a slight pliability that tells me the dry is perfect. A clean Bong with Ice of course is standing at the ready as I place a small pile into the glass bowl.
I thought once I actually grew out this cut and sampled it it would be just another over hyped strain but I was completely WRONG! The first thing that gets your attention is bud quality, each nuglet is hard and dense and just emitting a strong antiseptic smell combined with the strong smell of DANK. I find even as a Cannabis Journalist describing the taste and smell f Cheese is quite the challenge. I shove my face into a jar of perfectly cured bud as I type trying to come up with a description and I find it just impossible. Good, strong, dank, thick herbal smell and it just overwhelms the senses and makes you happy. You can keep smelling it all day and its extremely appealing to the pallet. Cheese is very frosty with resin but the trichome heads are fairly small and when I made Bubblehash the yield was medium but again the quality is outstanding and the Full melt hash has that same incredible taste. I am hoping Mamakind can help me with a description of the smell and taste. The buzz comes on strong and fast and my patients report instant pain relief from just a few tokes. I find the buzz happy and comforting but not overwhelming again making it weed you can smoke bowl after bowl of. I have a high tolerance so its probably stronger than I can tell. Overall it has quickly become one of our favorite smokes. She is very easy to grow and clone and only needs some bud support to prevent her ample buds from falling over late in bloom.
Many strains that are sought after never measure up to the hype surrounding them but this is one bud we will be smoking for a long time to come. Lovely Jubbley
Edit Note**
In the End Pistils did not follow through with global distribution and ripped TGA off for thousands and thousands of seeds. This wouldn't be his side of things but thats what happpened 
We left the old site and now do our own thing.
) before he chops and smokes it all but he lives a few hours away and pictures aren't his forte...
