Spit or Swallow

cannabineer · Nov 11, 2012

nonuggets said:
Which did you prefer? swallow or not even interested in sucking your dick? i like girls who want to sexually gratify me. not ones that will give a half ass attempt at a blow job just to get it out of the way. if they don't want to put the effort in for me, then why should i do anything for them? this is merely an academic discussion on sexuality. i stated my definition of what prude is, not wanting to suck dick at all, and i got accused of wanting girls to "bend and scrape" for me. now if i said. i expect women to suck my dick, swallow, while cleaning the floors and cooking dinner, i think her comment might of made sense.

Personally, I much prefer tail to head. I recognize that head is hard work to do right, and I've always preferred the feeling of no teeth and a deep place. TMI, perhaps.
The other qualification I must add is that I haven't had many experiences. So far in my desert of a love life ... I've never received great head. Part of it is an anatomical issue ~blush~ ...
As for the tone of your post and the responses ... tone is very hard to judge through two screens. Maybe allow for some leeway and relax about it. Jmo. cn

Urca · Nov 11, 2012

Hmm well the thing is, when a girl is giving you head, she is doing it to please you. I never half assed it, always did it the best as I could, as much or as fast, as deep as he wanted, even if it made me uncomfortable. he would pull out when it was time, but there were a few times it has just happened and he couldnt control it... excludig one time where I happened to pull away and he pulled me back down to finish.
But I never asked for anything in return, and the only time I did he told me he would never return the favor and wouldnt sleep with me.

That behavior is socially acceptable in men, but if a woman did, she would be considered a prude, a tease, an all around bad girl. A woman is not a prude if she wont let you cum in her mouth. She did what she could to please you and make you happy, dealing with personal discomfort. I hate that it is expected for women to do everything they can but if they dont do it the way men absolutely want it, she is a prude and a bitch

fumble · Nov 11, 2012

well said urca

Carne Seca · Nov 12, 2012

nonuggets said:
i don't understand women

Fixed it for you.

You have a forum full of stoner women here. Maybe you should stop dictating how they should perform and focus on what they're telling you.

Urca · Nov 12, 2012

nonuggets said:
lol that man is long gone but he never did shit for me. most women give and give because we are trained to show our affection that way. We feel like all we do is give and never recieve. That is what we ae saying. You're not bad for wanting a blow job, you're just idiotic to think she is half assing it because she wont let you cum in her mouth. Have you ever tasted your own spunk? Men taste gross when they cum. yet women swallow because we want to please you.
It doesnt mean anything if we dont swallow or even let you cum in our mouths.

Carne Seca · Nov 12, 2012

nonuggets said:
they're telling me that they think they are viewed as sex slaves. i never dictated how they should perform, i merely stated what men like. is that so wrong that guys like blow jobs with good finishes? why does it upset women that guys like that? this is sex...its not suppose to be icky or involve things people don't like to do, it should be open and fun for both parties.

It's kind of hard to be fun for both parties when one member of said party doesn't like having a stiff sausage stuffed down her throat. There are gay guys like that too. That's when you perfect the art of the handjob. Sex is about compromise. If you are THAT upset about not getting blow jobs then find someone that enjoys it. I don't do anal. That doesn't mean I don't kick ass in bed.

Urca · Nov 12, 2012

nonuggets said:
but apparently, women view any effort they make to please a man as a submission and domination. how much more focused on what they are saying can i be?

lol not what we're saying. we're saying some men take advanatage alot and have unreasonable expectations, but if a woman had said no to these selfish men, we'd be called prude, tease, etc.

Urca · Nov 12, 2012

nonuggets said:
its not even that i'm all about blow jobs...i will lick pussy, ass, do whatever whenever to satisfy a woman, i want them to cum. giving some head isn't a big fucking deal, but these women make it seem like it's degrading. if their guy isn't receprocating, i wouldn't expect them to, but in the case where they are getting their rocks off steady, they should be more than willing to give a little.

we're only talking about instances where a swallow or cum in the mouth is demanded, or expected, and when the men dont reciprocate

Padawanbater2 · Nov 12, 2012

Carne Seca said:
It's kind of hard to be fun for both parties when one member of said party doesn't like having a stiff sausage stuffed down her throat. There are gay guys like that too. That's when you perfect the art of the handjob. Sex is about compromise. If you are THAT upset about not getting blow jobs then find someone that enjoys it. I don't do anal. That doesn't mean I don't kick ass in bed.

How common is that in the gay community?

Why don't you do anal? Yep, I just asked that.

Do you give but not receive, or is everything out of the question?

Padawanbater2 · Nov 12, 2012

nonuggets said:
its not even that i'm all about blow jobs...i will lick pussy, ass, do whatever whenever to satisfy a woman, i want them to cum. giving some head isn't a big fucking deal, but these women make it seem like it's degrading. if their guy isn't receprocating, i wouldn't expect them to, but in the case where they are getting their rocks off steady, they should be more than willing to give a little.

I agree, there have been more than a handful of times I've felt like I'd given much more than received. It tends to leave you with a feeling of "wtf?", especially after multiple instances..

For example, I've gone down on a chick, gotten her off multiple times, and then expected to be taken care of only to be told "I'm not in the mood anymore..". Well no shit you're not, you just got off! What about me? To make it worse, some chicks actually get mad, honestly mad, if you do it yourself while watching some porn. "Porn degrades women!".. I'm not saying all women are like this, but that's seriously unreasonable.. I try not to hold those experiences against the rest of the flock, but it seems the more I venture out into the sexual world, more and more women I meet are the hardcore feminist types bent on independence and not letting you touch or see their body. Lights off, no sexy pics, no dirty talk, as if it's the plague!

Guys like the lights on, guys like a little flirting with sexy pics, guys like your body, if we didn't, we wouldn't fuck you, and even then, some of us probably would! It doesn't mean we're treating you as objects, it means we're respecting you as a woman, and appreciating everything you are and especially for letting us into that corner of your life to examine who you are for ourselves. We know we're lucky to be there, that few if any have been there before. Internally we appreciate it as much as a loyal dog or tasty home cooked meal, even though we may not always show it.

If a woman lets me sleep with her, I consider it a gift, not just to me, but also to you. I worked hard enough and pushed the right buttons, played the right keys and got to know and trust who you are and what you're about, as you did me. Don't let the sluts and the man whores of the world ruin that aspect of sexual gratification for you. Not all of us are like that.

KenTheMan · Nov 12, 2012

nonuggets said:
so basically what i'm hearing is, you've dating pieces of shit and gotten treated badly...imagine that! who would think that would happen? so now generalize every man because you've picked the wrong ones. i'm sorry that that is the case, but if you have a guy/girl that treats you well outside the bedroom, do whatever they want in it. i know i do.

Everything you said just then could be repeated back to you, about the women you've dated. From what I've read they sound like keepers....

There's women out there that just don't like to have objects in there mouth, gagging makes them sick, the thought of licking something urine came out of, morals, how they were raised, lots of things man. Dunno how you haven't came across this yet with all your experience with women.

Carne Seca · Nov 12, 2012

Padawanbater2 said:
How common is that in the gay community?

Why don't you do anal? Yep, I just asked that.

Do you give but not receive, or is everything out of the question?

Well, I don't do anything anymore since I recommitted myself to my faith. But I didn't like the thought of it. It was disgusting to me. it's not common but it's not unheard of. There are ways around it that are just as satisfying for both parties. Everything is off the table when it comes to anal sex. If I was interested in someone and we had a few skirmishes I made sure they knew my butt was off limits. Most were perfectly fine with it and some just walked away. No harm no foul.

Padawanbater2 · Nov 12, 2012

Carne Seca said:
Well, I don't do anything anymore since I recommitted myself to my faith. But I didn't like the thought of it. It was disgusting to me. it's not common but it's not unheard of. There are ways around it that are just as satisfying for both parties. Everything is off the table when it comes to anal sex. If I was interested in someone and we had a few skirmishes I made sure they knew my butt was off limits. Most were perfectly fine with it and some just walked away. No harm no foul.

I don't know a lot about Mormonism, but doesn't your faith explicitly state being homosexual is a sin?

Again, forgive the ignorance, I just haven't studied it in detail

How have you recommitted yourself, and why? (if you don't mind me asking, of course, if you do I'll gladly shut the fuck up about it)

Carne Seca · Nov 12, 2012

Padawanbater2 said:
I don't know a lot about Mormonism, but doesn't your faith explicitly state being homosexual is a sin?

Again, forgive the ignorance, I just haven't studied it in detail

How have you recommitted yourself, and why? (if you don't mind me asking, of course, if you do I'll gladly shut the fuck up about it)

Nope. it's the sexual activity that's frowned upon. Sex outside of marriage. Big no-no. I no longer have sexual intimacy with other men. Not that I was a whore or anything but I did enjoy a little mattress exercise now and then. I attend church and perform my duties and responsibilities as a LDS member. Meanwhile I have great times with my family and friends (who think I'm crazy for coming back to the church). I still advocate social and marriage equality for LGBT's. I'm very vocal about it.

Padawanbater2 · Nov 12, 2012

Carne Seca said:
Nope. it's the sexual activity that's frowned upon. Sex outside of marriage. Big no-no. I no longer have sexual intimacy with other men. Not that I was a whore or anything but I did enjoy a little mattress exercise now and then. I attend church and perform my duties and responsibilities as a LDS member. Meanwhile I have great times with my family and friends (who think I'm crazy for coming back to the church). I still advocate social and marriage equality for LGBT's. I'm very vocal about it.

What made you reconsider your previous lifestyle?

How is your outspoken nature regarding such subjects viewed inside the church?

Carne Seca · Nov 12, 2012

Padawanbater2 said:
What made you reconsider your previous lifestyle?

How is your outspoken nature regarding such subjects viewed inside the church?

My family. My crazy, loving, accepting, knuckle-headed family. I want to be with them forever. I can't be with them if I'm living a disobedient lifestyle. When I was a child I was sealed to them in the temple for time and all eternity. This is not an absolute. I have to be obedient to the Gospel to qualify. Faith without works is dead. I don't want to get into a theological debate. I'm just explaining the mindset. It's not just a religion. It's a culture. A culture I was raised in and for most of my life the only thing I knew. I grew up in a Mormon community on the outskirts of the Navajo reservation. I come from a long line of Mormons. It's in the blood.

I was living in SLC when the change came about. I moved up there for an excellent job opportunity (the company later fired me for being gay). While I was there I heard that Gladys Knight was giving a fireside talk. I attended and it transformed my life. I realized that my bitterness and anger was keeping me from what I was. A Latter Day Saint. My bitterness and anger was generated by my bishop outing me to my family and finding out about the ban on blacks having the Priesthood. It was a two punch knock-out. I left. I called my bishop and told him to take his church and shove it up his ass. That scored me some points with my family. Wow. It was like stirring up a hornet's nest. I never apologized. He died about a year later from cancer. Now I wish I had the chance to apologize.

But I had been missing it. I made a choice. Not a choice that I would recommend to others but it was a choice that worked for me. Every individual has a right to choose their path in life. I chose to follow my "culture".

Padawanbater2 · Nov 12, 2012

Carne Seca said:
My family. My crazy, loving, accepting, knuckle-headed family. I want to be with them forever. I can't be with them if I'm living a disobedient lifestyle. When I was a child I was sealed to them in the temple for time and all eternity. This is not an absolute. I have to be obedient to the Gospel to qualify. Faith without works is dead. I don't want to get into a theological debate. I'm just explaining the mindset. It's not just a religion. It's a culture. A culture I was raised in and for most of my life the only thing I knew. I grew up in a Mormon community on the outskirts of the Navajo reservation. I come from a long line of Mormons. It's in the blood.

Do you believe in an eternal afterlife?

Carne Seca said:
I was living in SLC when the change came about. I moved up there for an excellent job opportunity (the company later fired me for being gay). While I was there I heard that Gladys Knight was giving a fireside talk. I attended and it transformed my life. I realized that my bitterness and anger was keeping me from what I was. A Latter Day Saint. My bitterness and anger was generated by my bishop outing me to my family and finding out about the ban on blacks having the Priesthood. It was a two punch knock-out. I left. I called my bishop and told him to take his church and shove it up his ass. That scored me some points with my family. Wow. It was like stirring up a hornet's nest. I never apologized. He died about a year later from cancer. Now I wish I had the chance to apologize.

Fuck that company. What was it so I can boycott it? Also, you definitely have a case for legal action, fyi..

What do you mean by "my family"? Father, mother, sisters or brothers, cousins?

Carne Seca · Nov 12, 2012

Padawanbater2 said:
Do you believe in an eternal afterlife?

Yes I do. It's part of the Mormon experience.

Padawanbater2 said:
Fuck that company. What was it so I can boycott it? Also, you definitely have a case for legal action, fyi..

What do you mean by "my family"? Father, mother, sisters or brothers, cousins?

It was a research company owned by a Mormon family. Utah is an at will state and had no protections in place for LGBT's at that time. I had no legal recourse. I even told them it was wrongful termination. They just said, "we are at will employers." Then I was escorted out the door by security.

By family I mean my immediate family and all of my extended family that were sealed in the temple as well.

Padawanbater2 · Nov 12, 2012

Anonymous firebomb time, son. Fuck that shit. Just make sure everyone is out of the building at the time. Nobody needs some manslaughter charges!

How did they feel when you weren't a part of the church?

Carne Seca · Nov 12, 2012

Padawanbater2 said:
Anonymous firebomb time, son. Fuck that shit. Just make sure everyone is out of the building at the time. Nobody needs some manslaughter charges!

How did they feel when you weren't a part of the church?

I never discussed it. I was just living my life and going about my business. I was spotted at a gay pride parade. It was my first. I was a little scared to attend. A good friend I met at the gym asked me to go with him. He outed me to a group of lesbians and cross-dressers and the party was on. I had a great time and they treated me like spun gold. I was seen by a coworker who then informed my boss. He called me in the following Monday and fired me on the spot. I knew something was fishy when I saw HR and security in the office with him. I guess he was afraid I would scratch his eyes out or something. I don't even think they're in business anymore. I kept in touch with another coworker and he left right after me. He said the company was doing terrible and they were laying people off by the droves.

Spit or Swallow

Spit, Swallow, Neither

Spit

Swallow

Neither

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