Put a bible over your penis, says Pope Benedict.

diggitydank420

diggitydank420

Well-Known Member
http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/health/put-a-bible-over-your-penis,-says-pope-200903181648/

POPE Benedict last night claimed that placing a bible over an erect penis before intercourse is the only guaranteed way to prevent the spread of Aids.

May cause chafing​
Speaking before his tour of Africa, the Pontiff said Aids could only be tackled by the 'traditional teaching of the church' and not a latex rubber sheath that contains infected semen and prevents it from transferring the virus to another human being.

Experts said that either the Pope is suggesting the bible is used like a condom, or he doesn't know what a condom is.

Dr Emma Bradford, of Reading University, said: "I guess you would have to rip out a few pages of Leviticus and then somehow fashion them into a condom-like device using lots and lots of masking tape.

"Or you could shred the pages, soak them in water and construct something that looks a bit like a paper maché cigar tube."

Dr Bradford added: "It has to be one of those two because suggesting that the African Aids epidemic can be contained simply by reading the bible would be criminally insane."

Since his inauguration in 2005 the Pope has continued the Church's strong opposition to condoms by calling for abstinence, supervised heavy petting and whacking it repeatedly with a wooden spoon until it goes all soft again.

Meanwhile the Vatican has issued this year's list of approved non-penetrative carnal techniques including pearl necklaces, light genital branding and something called 'Dutch steamboating'.
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:clap::clap::clap::clap::clap::clap::clap:
 
Louis541

Louis541

Well-Known Member
As an alternative, you could smack the femal e in the vagina with a bible while yelling "The power of christ repells you!" exorcist style....
 
ANC

ANC

Well-Known Member
Possibly, he's never see na vagina, so has a hard time conceptualising the mechanics...
 
D

davalaban

Active Member
How could anybody take a trip to Africa and stand before the world and say that condom use is not part of the answer to prevent AIDS. This is rediculous.

Dogma > Peoples lives?

:leaf:
 
E

ejf1676

Well-Known Member
THATS FUNNY BECAUSE IM CATHOLIC AND I ALWAYS THAT THESE WERE THE CURE FOR AIDS IN DIFFERING DOSAGES OF COURSE
AND THEN THERE IS THEY COMMUNITY WIDE CURE ADMINISTERING SOLUTION
ALSO AVAILABLE IN DIFFERING DOSAGES
 
TheDankness

TheDankness

Well-Known Member
ejf1676 said:
THATS FUNNY BECAUSE IM CATHOLIC AND I ALWAYS THAT THESE WERE THE CURE FOR AIDS IN DIFFERING DOSAGES OF COURSE
AND THEN THERE IS THEY COMMUNITY WIDE CURE ADMINISTERING SOLUTION
ALSO AVAILABLE IN DIFFERING DOSAGES
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You are an idiot. Go smoke a bowl and chill.
 
poplars

poplars

Well-Known Member
ejf1676 said:
THATS FUNNY BECAUSE IM CATHOLIC AND I ALWAYS THAT THESE WERE THE CURE FOR AIDS IN DIFFERING DOSAGES OF COURSE
AND THEN THERE IS THEY COMMUNITY WIDE CURE ADMINISTERING SOLUTION
ALSO AVAILABLE IN DIFFERING DOSAGES
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fuck I hope for the world's sake there aren't very many catholics like you . . .
 
B

Boogaloo Bud

Well-Known Member
ejf1676 said:
THATS FUNNY BECAUSE IM CATHOLIC AND I ALWAYS THAT THESE WERE THE CURE FOR AIDS IN DIFFERING DOSAGES OF COURSE
AND THEN THERE IS THEY COMMUNITY WIDE CURE ADMINISTERING SOLUTION
ALSO AVAILABLE IN DIFFERING DOSAGES
Click to expand...
Sure, why don't we just all get rid of the people who arn't in perfect health. Take them out back and shoot them. Send nukes over to Africa and there wouldn't be a problem....

Your an idiot if you actually beleive what your wrote and if you don't, then your an idiot for posting useless garbage on a site just to get a reaction.

Lets just say in theory that your idea was to be used. How would you answer to the people in this continent who's kinds are mutated from birth from all the radio-activitity from the nukes you feel like sending to africa?

Africa has problems right now. But what your implying would be millions of times more harmfull to North-Americans then the Aids in Africa ever were.

How would you feel if you or someone close to you got aids accidentally? Sex doesn't have to happen for Aids to spread. You could have someone who spends all their life giving to charities, helping other people, etc. What happends if one day that person is in a car accident and needs a blood transfusion? It's possible that through no fault of their own their injected with blod containing the aids virus? It has happened.

Take your idiotic ideas and crawl back into your cave until they come as good ones......
 
E

ejf1676

Well-Known Member
OK GOT ME THAT WAS A STUPID AND IGNORANT SOUNDING THING TO SAY BUT THE POPE WAS GETTING INSULTED BLASPHEMED EVEN I THINK WHAT THE POPE IS TRYING TO SAY IS THE BIBLE TEACHES ABSTINENCE AND SANCTITY (INSANITY?) OF MARRIAGE ANYWAY THAT REALLY WOULD WORK WELL AND IN many CULTURES IS STILL A RESPECTED MORAL CODE IF INDEED YOU CAUGHT HIV/AIDS ACCIDENTALLY THAT WOULD BE TRAGIC INDEED ALTHOUGH I DON'T KNOW THE EXACT NUMBERS CONCERNING AIDS IN AFRICA I KNOW THAT IT IS AN EPIDEMIC AND THE EXTREME MAJORITY OF THE POPULATION IS AFFECTED BY IT PARTICULARLY CHILDREN


THEN AT THAT POINT I THINK THERE MIGHT BE A PROBLEM IN THE CORE BELIEF/VALUE/MORAL/RELIGOUS VALUE SYSTEM IN PLACE AS THIS PROBLEM IS MUCH MORE SEVERE THAN A FEW GUYS NEEDING RUBBERS TO GET LAID AFTER THE BAR THESE PEOPLE HAVE OBVIOUSLY CHOSEN DEVIANCE OVER THEIR OWN WELL BEING AND I DO BELIEVE THAT THE TEACHINGS OF THE BIBLE WOULD FIT THE PROBLEM ALONE BETTER THAN CONDOMS ALONE BEING A REALIST I WOULD SAY A COMBINATION OF BOTH WOULD BE FANTASTIC




THANX FOR LAUGHING AT MY JOKE IT COULDN'T HAVE BEEN WORSE THAN INSULTING THE POPE DUH DE DUH
 
B

Boogaloo Bud

Well-Known Member
ejf1676 said:
OK GOT ME THAT WAS A STUPID AND IGNORANT SOUNDING THING TO SAY BUT THE POPE WAS GETTING INSULTED BLASPHEMED EVEN I THINK WHAT THE POPE IS TRYING TO SAY IS THE BIBLE TEACHES ABSTINENCE AND SANCTITY (INSANITY?) OF MARRIAGE ANYWAY THAT REALLY WOULD WORK WELL AND IN many CULTURES IS STILL A RESPECTED MORAL CODE IF INDEED YOU CAUGHT HIV/AIDS ACCIDENTALLY THAT WOULD BE TRAGIC INDEED ALTHOUGH I DON'T KNOW THE EXACT NUMBERS CONCERNING AIDS IN AFRICA I KNOW THAT IT IS AN EPIDEMIC AND THE EXTREME MAJORITY OF THE POPULATION IS AFFECTED BY IT PARTICULARLY CHILDREN


THEN AT THAT POINT I THINK THERE MIGHT BE A PROBLEM IN THE CORE BELIEF/VALUE/MORAL/RELIGOUS VALUE SYSTEM IN PLACE AS THIS PROBLEM IS MUCH MORE SEVERE THAN A FEW GUYS NEEDING RUBBERS TO GET LAID AFTER THE BAR THESE PEOPLE HAVE OBVIOUSLY CHOSEN DEVIANCE OVER THEIR OWN WELL BEING AND I DO BELIEVE THAT THE TEACHINGS OF THE BIBLE WOULD FIT THE PROBLEM ALONE BETTER THAN CONDOMS ALONE BEING A REALIST I WOULD SAY A COMBINATION OF BOTH WOULD BE FANTASTIC




THANX FOR LAUGHING AT MY JOKE IT COULDN'T HAVE BEEN WORSE THAN INSULTING THE POPE DUH DE DUH
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Don't get me wrong, I think the pope is a joke. His ideas are nonesense. Where did he get the idea of a Bible being used to prevent the spread of Aids? Saying stupid idiotic things like that are just gonna make the problem worse for those that are listening to him. What the Vatican don't realize is by spreading bullshit like this, their actually making the problem worse.

I'm not saying science beat religion or vice-versa but it amaze's me that people in a position of power are allowed to make such statements with the only reprecussions coming in the form of the people who have died because they beleived him. I think religious leaders, scientific leaders, etc should be held accountable for what they telll the public is the truth and isn't.
 
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