Pix That Make You LOL-Warning-SNWS

Winter Woman

Well-Known Member
A romantic vacation love story!
He grasped me firmly but gently just above my elbow and guided me into a room, his room. Then he quietly shut the door and we were alone.

He approached me soundlessly, from behind, and spoke in a low, reassuring voice close to my ear.

"Just relax."

Without warning, he reached down and I felt his strong, calloused
hands start at my ankles, gently probing, and moving upward along my
calves slowly but steadily. My breath caught in my throat. I knew I
should be afraid, but somehow I didn't care. His touch was so
experienced, so sure.

When his hands moved up onto my thighs, I gave a slight shudder, and
partly closed my eyes. My pulse was pounding. I felt his knowing
fingers caress my abdomen, my ribcage. And then, as he cupped my firm,
full breasts in his hands, I inhaled sharply. Probing, searching,
knowing what he wanted, he brought his hands to my shoulders, slid
them down my tingling spine and into my panties.

Although I knew nothing about this man, I felt oddly trusting and expectant. This is a man, I thought. A man used to taking charge. A man not used to taking `no' for an answer. A man who would tell me what he wanted. A man who would look into my soul and say ...

"Okay, ma'am, all done."

My eyes snapped open and he was standing in front of me, smiling, holding out my purse.
"You can board your flight now."
 

DaBong

Well-Known Member
One day this lady is walking around her house, and finds a light bulb that has burned out. She asks her husband to change it, and he says:

"Hell NO! What do I look like? A fucking electrician?"

So, later that day...she finds that the toilet has backed up, and asks her husband to fix it, and he says:

"Hell NO! What do I look like? A fucking plumber?"

So the next day, her husband returns home from work, and the wife tells him, I had the plumber over today to fix the toilet, I didn't have enough money to pay him with, So he told me I could either bake him a pie, or I could have sex with him.

Her husband replies, "So, you baked him a pie, right?" The wife replied:

"Hell NO! What do I look like? A fucking pastry chef?"
 

Winter Woman

Well-Known Member
A Son asks his Father...

What is this weird hat that we are wearing?
Why, it's a "chechia" because in the desert it protects our heads from the sun!
And what is this type of clothing that we are wearing?
It's a "djbellah" because in the desert it is very hot and it protects your body!
And what are these ugly shoes that we have on our feet?
These are "babouches", which keep us from burning our feet when in the desert!
Tell me Abba...
Yes my son?
Why are we living in Dearborn , Michigan and still wearing all this shit ???
 
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