Ok so maybe a few of you have wondered why that hell hole of a State, North Dakota, seems to plague me. Every time I look for some statistic to make a point it seems North Dakota keeps coming up. It pisses me off, because I really hate that state and I will tell you why.
Back quite some time ago I was in the USMC and had just finished the big basic technical school you go to learn your profession. Well the school was in Memphis, Tennessee and I had acclimated my self to the extreme heat and humidity for almost a year. I then had to go to a Navy base for a more advanced school that was located in Whidbey Island , Washington. North of Seattle. The place where they filmed "An officer and a gentleman". Well anyway It was February and I got orders to go, So I packed my meager belongings into my 1973 Dodge Challenger (383 with a 3 speed manual for you Mopar fans) and took off.
Used I 94 to get to Seattle, well 94 goes right through the middle of BFE North Dakota. Guess what? Its very, very, very much still winter in the middle of February in that state. Minnesota was a breeze, but as soon as I got past Fargo, North Dakota I ran into what I thought was hell itself. It wasn't snowing, but the wind was blowing like a Mutha fucker. It was blowing the snow around like crazy, and they had snow, holy shit there were drifts bigger than my entire car and some of them were starting to go across the interstate. Well guess what? Apparently when vehicles pack the snow down it turns to ice so black that you can't see it. well the friggin roads were made of that. A 73 dodge challenger is a front heavy, rear wheel drive monster. A 383 magnum engine made 335 horse. Also I was running summer bias ply tires ( anyone remember bias ply?) needless to say it was EXTREMELY difficult to keep the nose of the car pointing in the right direction.
I dug myself out ( no shovel, thanks floor mat)on two occasions, ran into only 2 signs and 1 pole. Put a small hole in my oil pan when I sheared off the sign that told me Bismarck was only 30 miles away. Apparently people who live in North Dakota are not stupid enough, nor numerous enough, to go out in this kind of weather. The only vehicles I really ever saw were freight trucks, and they don't stop for no one. A Highway patrolman did stop once when I was in the median in 5 feet of snow and he got me pulled out, so I was grateful for that. The roads got better the closer to Bismarck I got and thats when my oil light came on 2 miles out. So I limped my rig into a service station (remember those?) and had to end up getting a hotel room and use a cab to get around.
When I got to the room I looked at my left ear, the lobe was as black as pitch, frostbite! It hurt, but not as bad as my fingers which had also gotten a bit too cold while digging the car out. The fingers were a bit better the next day and survived, my ear lobe eventually fell off. Then the next day I found out how cold it had gotten, 48 below zero, and 68 below with the wind chill factor. Did you know that mercury freezes at -37F? I didn't, until the desk clerk at the hotel showed me. I got my car the next morning, got something to eat and headed out again. the wind had passed and the rest of the trip wasn't so bad, except the time I went off the road again, but that was in Montana.
Today I noticed that my Initials are ND and North Dakota is ND
Back quite some time ago I was in the USMC and had just finished the big basic technical school you go to learn your profession. Well the school was in Memphis, Tennessee and I had acclimated my self to the extreme heat and humidity for almost a year. I then had to go to a Navy base for a more advanced school that was located in Whidbey Island , Washington. North of Seattle. The place where they filmed "An officer and a gentleman". Well anyway It was February and I got orders to go, So I packed my meager belongings into my 1973 Dodge Challenger (383 with a 3 speed manual for you Mopar fans) and took off.
Used I 94 to get to Seattle, well 94 goes right through the middle of BFE North Dakota. Guess what? Its very, very, very much still winter in the middle of February in that state. Minnesota was a breeze, but as soon as I got past Fargo, North Dakota I ran into what I thought was hell itself. It wasn't snowing, but the wind was blowing like a Mutha fucker. It was blowing the snow around like crazy, and they had snow, holy shit there were drifts bigger than my entire car and some of them were starting to go across the interstate. Well guess what? Apparently when vehicles pack the snow down it turns to ice so black that you can't see it. well the friggin roads were made of that. A 73 dodge challenger is a front heavy, rear wheel drive monster. A 383 magnum engine made 335 horse. Also I was running summer bias ply tires ( anyone remember bias ply?) needless to say it was EXTREMELY difficult to keep the nose of the car pointing in the right direction.
I dug myself out ( no shovel, thanks floor mat)on two occasions, ran into only 2 signs and 1 pole. Put a small hole in my oil pan when I sheared off the sign that told me Bismarck was only 30 miles away. Apparently people who live in North Dakota are not stupid enough, nor numerous enough, to go out in this kind of weather. The only vehicles I really ever saw were freight trucks, and they don't stop for no one. A Highway patrolman did stop once when I was in the median in 5 feet of snow and he got me pulled out, so I was grateful for that. The roads got better the closer to Bismarck I got and thats when my oil light came on 2 miles out. So I limped my rig into a service station (remember those?) and had to end up getting a hotel room and use a cab to get around.
When I got to the room I looked at my left ear, the lobe was as black as pitch, frostbite! It hurt, but not as bad as my fingers which had also gotten a bit too cold while digging the car out. The fingers were a bit better the next day and survived, my ear lobe eventually fell off. Then the next day I found out how cold it had gotten, 48 below zero, and 68 below with the wind chill factor. Did you know that mercury freezes at -37F? I didn't, until the desk clerk at the hotel showed me. I got my car the next morning, got something to eat and headed out again. the wind had passed and the rest of the trip wasn't so bad, except the time I went off the road again, but that was in Montana.
Today I noticed that my Initials are ND and North Dakota is ND
....shut the fuck up.....lol
