Ok. It looks like I have stumbled in on a conversation about my very favorite drug! I wrote the following article about a week ago and posted it by request on another website. I have simply copied it and reposted it:
"What I know of the Spirit Molecule"
A bout this time last year I mastered the process of extracting and isolating N, N, DMT from Mimosa Hostilis root bark. I worked with what I remembered of high school chemistry, basic understandings of polar and non polar solvents etc. I should say that the whole process is very easy. Hardly could consider it chemistry at all. Once you know what works and what doesn't it is literally as easy as making tea. (you just have to repeat the process of making tea many many times going back and forth between acidic and basic and washing out with solvent, etc). I'm not here to write a story about how to make it, though. I'm here to write a story about what the experience is like. I've offered this first paragraph to answer the question, "Where'd you get the DMT"?
While I was figuring out the easiest, most effiecient way to get it made, I took a lot of threshold doses. I was testing how easily the precipitated crystals vaporized, inhaleability, harshness, etc. But I never really took myself anywhere until I was sure I had gotten it right. My first real experience was rushed, and a little hectic because my wife has a stigma with smoking any kind of substance that smoked the same way as crack. Whatever. The 2 things are totally different and on and on, but I could just never get her over it. So I had to really goad at her until she agreed to let me do it at all. Normally I would have told her to get pissed, but if it reminds her of crack, then I want to make sure she can deal with me lighting up a stem right in front of her.
My first experience showed me things that I will never forget. I gained unsurmountable insights into myself and it took a month or two to sort it all out and make sense of it at all. That is not to say I learned to articulate what I experienced and for that trip, I did not even try to explain it. But that maiden voyage also taught me things about DMT that I was able to bring to the next trip which was millions and millions of times more insightful than the first. Things like not rushing it. Not looking for it. I was able to understand after the first one that I would be in the presence of higher beings, and that those beings required respect. Setting clearly could enhance the experience as random noises become completely annoying and distracting. Also something I didn't realize is that when your body experiences a loss of ego, it is hard for it to recognize your identity once it comes back. I came back from the first experience repeating my name, address, and what I did for a living, etc. It suprised me a little bit.
I decided that I was going to share the experience with someone close to me and I asked a friend of mine if she would try it with me. This particular friend and I have been friends for years and years. She's very insightful, expressive, and open. She's down for just about whatever and she agreed. So we set a date and time.
The night of the experience we decided to go on an empty stomach. We put on some goa trance that sounded really... hindu-ish? Because of the "beings" I hoped to encounter I wanted to be very meditative before, during and after and hope I could remember something. We looked at some mandala tapestries, and cleared our minds repeating mantras and just got really comfortable definitely anticipating what we were about to do, but not rushing it. I had a DMT piece made by a local glass blower and it was already loaded and I helped her get the thing hot and when the crystals vaped, she took a huge hit, held it for a time and exhaled. She took 3 hits in all in under 30 seconds. I followed her. I remember putting the pipe down and I was no longer on Planet Earth. I was in a place that was the most familiar place I have ever been, but I could not put my finger on why it was so familiar.
I did not have a body and I was surrounded by spirits that were babbling a strange, multi dimensional language. A language whose sounds and articulations became colors or numeric patterns. I could understand them, and I felt pride that I was part of something hidden and wonderful and at the same time I was sad because I could not actually speak this beautiful language. I watched as the spirits watched me, whispering about me as if they were confused because they clearly were glad to see me, but they did not expect me so soon.
I was never approached by any induvidual entity although I was aware of several of them talking into me all at once. Even though the language was so complex, I was able to discern each induvidual conversation, and I was infused with the knowledge that we are all of a single divine thing, that every living person belongs to that same divine center. Like a loose definition of Namaste, "I appreciate the God that is in You that is in Me" or trying to be the buddha that looks at the world from your own perspective looking at everything as the buddha looking at the world from your perspective until every grain of sand is the buddha that is you.
I was able to gaze upon written texts that were written in a language that I could understand. The symbols on the texts moved and writhed, and changed shape as they gave up their secrets. As I looked at the texts, it was explained to me that what I was looking at was the story of my life. What it was, what it is, and what it will be, and that in the moment before my conception in an instant that was so infinite it could not be measured in terms of time, my soul collaborated with the voice in my head and together, we scripted my life and that the document I was looking at was actually written by me, and that my soul was so ancient, I had scripted other lives I've lived 5000 times before.
I started to become aware that I was slipping away from this wonderful place and bagan to panic. The spirits immediately sensed this, and I was filled with a perfect feeling of peace and tranquility that I have not known in life. I understood the feeling as surely as if it were one of my own thoughts and I began to let go. I first became aware of my arms and was alarmed to see that they has been transformed into clear gelatinous rubik snakes' and as soon as I recognized the ridiculousness of the thought I relaxed and sunk into my friend. Our bodies were homogenized into a thick glob of organic clay, reminiscent of what I had just learned that all of our souls are like. As our souls accepted our mortal bodies, and began to separate I noticed that my arms, hands and indeed my entire body was carved deeply with the same undulating writing that was on the texts. The voice in my head was almost imperceptbly insisting that I remember the writings and its message that I carry like badges upon my soul.
Only 25 minutes had passed since we smoked. The experience seemed to last longer than my adult life.
We laid there gasping and trying to articulate anything about what we had just experienced. When we were unable, we took a walk. For the next hour and a half, we basked in the afterglow, and everything that we saw: cars, rocks, even trash we were consciously aware of its place in the universe as though they had been intentionally placed there just for us to notice. I was unable to describe any of this- even in my head, for a long time. I have thought of it often for the last 2 years, and have made a reasonable amount of sense out of it in pieces here and there. This was my first real attempt to share the experience. I hope you enjoyed.
