ClaytonNewbilFontaine
Well-Known Member
Not even one of the captions could say "good luck"?
Going to take a drug test for a job today, wish me luck.
- Thread starter ClaytonNewbilFontaine
- Start date
PadawanWarrior
Well-Known Member
They're probably just doing a basic cheap test for their insurance. I wouldn't be too concerned. But I'd try to find a clean dude if you can. They sell synthetic urine too. Along with fancy tools in case someone's standing behind you when you do it.
Most likely though, they just give you privacy but will shut the water off in the bathroom so you can't dilute it. Even though you can fail with diluted piss too.
MICHI-CAN
Well-Known Member
It is not luck. LOL.
And another story is my dropping for PO in the early 90's. Got the dreaded visit along with the, "Is that marijauna I smell?"I need you to drop tomorrow at 7 am.
Dirty as you know. I drank vegetable oil and gallons of water. I passed. Just luck of the pathetic science and my almost no body fat.
Drop That Sound
Well-Known Member
I wanna tell you to get one of those fake juice pouch IV bags, or even the real ones for cheap on ebay, because they are perfect for concealing liquids, and have a little valve on the tube to control the flow, which you can cut off as short.. or long.. as you need! 
The real ones have a pouch area that is made to hold medical papers right on the bag, but is actually perfect to put the hand warmers into, lol. So you can sandwich it between you and the warmers, with tape. They are way to big though IMO, and need to be cut in half, and re-seamed back together with a vacuum bag heat sealer thingamabob. The kids fake halloween IV gag bags look better to me, and what i would use.
Also, under any circumstance, never tell any female you know that you are faking a test, of any kind. Be sly about it, and get a a buddies pee. If you can keep it from her (who's business is it anyway?), you are doing it right. Or wrong.. either way.
The truth is, at least in my experience anyway, is sometimes it's best to just take a break for awhile, and make sacrifices. Especially to make room for the new things coming in your life..
You'll know when it seems like shit keeps happening to you for some reason, as if the universe got your back and trying to tell you something, but you take it as being unfortunate. In my experience anyway...
The real ones have a pouch area that is made to hold medical papers right on the bag, but is actually perfect to put the hand warmers into, lol. So you can sandwich it between you and the warmers, with tape. They are way to big though IMO, and need to be cut in half, and re-seamed back together with a vacuum bag heat sealer thingamabob. The kids fake halloween IV gag bags look better to me, and what i would use.
Also, under any circumstance, never tell any female you know that you are faking a test, of any kind. Be sly about it, and get a a buddies pee. If you can keep it from her (who's business is it anyway?), you are doing it right. Or wrong.. either way.
The truth is, at least in my experience anyway, is sometimes it's best to just take a break for awhile, and make sacrifices. Especially to make room for the new things coming in your life..
You'll know when it seems like shit keeps happening to you for some reason, as if the universe got your back and trying to tell you something, but you take it as being unfortunate. In my experience anyway...
DarkWeb
Well-Known Member
Good luck
ClaytonNewbilFontaine
Well-Known Member
I think you are right about the insurance thing. That was how they worded it when they told me. I've got a male I can get piss from. I think I'm safe, I don't think I'll have to Google "can you tell someone's age from their piss". Haha
DarkWeb
Well-Known Member
Herb & Suds
Well-Known Member
Only by taste
TCH
Well-Known Member
My oldest had to do a test for his new gig. They just do a generic test. If it comes back negative, you're all done. If it pops positive, it says the,alcohol, opiates, etc... and then they send it to the lab to verify. Fun fact, he learned that poppy seeds will in fact throw a positive for opiates. They sent his test in and it showed that it was just trace amounts and he was good to go.
ClaytonNewbilFontaine
Well-Known Member
That shits right on. That bag is a great idea. I've not seen them, but I'm sure an Amazon search would provide plenty of good options. Hopefully this will be the last drug test I have to take in a long time. Maybe the rest of my life, if I do things right.I wanna tell you to get one of those fake juice pouch IV bags, or even the real ones for cheap on ebay, because they are perfect for concealing liquids, and have a little valve on the tube to control the flow, which you can cut off as short.. or long.. as you need!
The real ones have a pouch area that is made to hold medical papers right on the bag, but is actually perfect to put the hand warmers into, lol. So you can sandwich it between you and the warmers, with tape. They are way to big though IMO, and need to be cut in half, and re-seamed back together with a vacuum bag heat sealer thingamabob. The kids fake halloween IV gag bags look better to me, and what i would use.
Also, under any circumstance, never tell any female you know that you are faking a test, of any kind. Be sly about it, and get a a buddies pee. If you can keep it from her (who's business is it anyway?), you are doing it right. Or wrong.. either way.
The truth is, at least in my experience anyway, is sometimes it's best to just take a break for awhile, and make sacrifices. Especially to make room for the new things coming in your life..
You'll know when it seems like shit keeps happening to you for some reason, as if the universe got your back and trying to tell you something, but you take it as being unfortunate. In my experience anyway...
ClaytonNewbilFontaine
Well-Known Member
Killaki
Well-Known Member
Try googling "can you detect diaper fibers in pee". Maybe just ask grandpa for pee.
TCH
Well-Known Member
Costco poppy seed muffins. He had one for breakfast 3 days in a row. The funny part is that at his orientation for the school and work program he is in, they served those costco poppy seed muffins. Haha
After he peed in the cup, he was in the office waiting on the results and a tik tok popped up about the poppy seeds and drug tests. Then the lady came in and goes "sooo, there's a problem with your drug test" he immediately said, I've eaten poppy seed muffins the last 3 days, will that cause a problem? Lol
Drop That Sound
Well-Known Member
Ya it works fine. I did multiple test runs with plain water and thermometer to make sure it was good first, before adding my buddie's dad's nasty rank orange clean piss.
You don't need to bring a thermometer with you, because it will somehow slip out of your pocket, and land on the floor in front of the old lady taking the sample. It's bad enough the things that can happen, like an old hag making you thing you need to drop your droors right in front of her, because she gets off on doing that to every guy taking a test every day.
Just breath warm 97 degree air onto the temp strip on the container for a minute after you fill it up, until it turns colors to verify it reached between 90-98.
That is all they are looking for before they bag up the sample.
You don't need to bring a thermometer with you, because it will somehow slip out of your pocket, and land on the floor in front of the old lady taking the sample. It's bad enough the things that can happen, like an old hag making you thing you need to drop your droors right in front of her, because she gets off on doing that to every guy taking a test every day.
Just breath warm 97 degree air onto the temp strip on the container for a minute after you fill it up, until it turns colors to verify it reached between 90-98.
That is all they are looking for before they bag up the sample.
tyler.durden
Well-Known Member
Coldnasty
Well-Known Member
Good luck! I never had much.lol
ClaytonNewbilFontaine
Well-Known Member
Just an update on the drug test. I passed! Everything went so perfectly that I truly believe the universe was helping me out with this whole thing. This job is going to be huge for me and my family! I really gotta thank you again @MICHI-CAN. If you didn't say anything yesterday I would've used the wrong piss and failed. They didn't use the dip stick, they immediately bottled it up and sent it to the lab. They would've seen the hormones in that piss. If I stop and think about how much you actually helped my life by sharing your experience, it becomes a bit overwhelming. I do disagree with you about luck though. I'm old enough and have seen enough to know that luck is real. Only if you believe in it though. And it was with me today. Prob cause @TCH wished me luck. It was crazy how smooth everything went today. Even shit like traffic, on my 1.5 hour drive there. Almost every light green, cars actually moving out of the fast lane when I approached their rear, the pee being exactly 98° by the time i pulled it out of my sock. I didn't have to sit there and waste time dropping the temp. There's more but they would be pretty insignificant to anyone else. I mean more insignificant than everything I've already said. I'm so fucking excited to quit my fucking job tomorrow!!! 
PadawanWarrior
Well-Known Member
Congrats. But how do you know they would have checked for hormones? They almost always send it to a lab anyways just for a plain drug test.Just an update on the drug test. I passed! Everything went so perfectly that I truly believe the universe was helping me out with this whole thing. This job is going to be huge for me and my family! I really gotta thank you again @MICHI-CAN. If you didn't say anything yesterday I would've used the wrong piss and failed. They didn't use the dip stick, they immediately bottled it up and sent it to the lab. They would've seen the hormones in that piss. If I stop and think about how much you actually helped my life by sharing your experience, it becomes a bit overwhelming. I do disagree with you about luck though. I'm old enough and have seen enough to know that luck is real. Only if you believe in it though. And it was with me today. Prob cause @TCH wished me luck. It was crazy how smooth everything went today. Even shit like traffic, on my 1.5 hour drive there. Almost every light green, cars actually moving out of the fast lane when I approached their rear, the pee being exactly 98° by the time i pulled it out of my sock. I didn't have to sit there and waste time dropping the temp. There's more but they would be pretty insignificant to anyone else. I mean more insignificant than everything I've already said. I'm so fucking excited to quit my fucking job tomorrow!!!
Maybe they would have found out though. I'm not sure how the lab shit works. And since she's pregnant that probably would be a bad idea,
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