Funny Stories?

now...i know everything seems funny when ur stoned...but im talking stuff thats super funny when ur sober too. like one night i was outside...it was around 1am...and i was smoking in the shed...lol. it was a windy night and my lighter wouldnt stay lit out in the open...but anyway. my neighbors next door are like family...their 3 dogs and my dog are all family so we have a hole cut in the fence so that the dogs can play together between 2 yards. well..the hole in the fence is beside the shed. then my neighbor got home from work and let the dogs out...now the youngest of their dogs is chico 3yrs old (all boxers by the way) hes my dogs brother. well...he could hear me outside i guess...so he came thru the hole into our yard and started looking around the yard, well...when i saw him i was all excited and i said "chico!" and then he got really startled and jumped...then ran back to his yard and started growling and barking...lol...funniest thing ever...some guard dog eh? lol i have a bunch of funny stories...but that one is by far my favourite...so! what about everyone else?

This one is a baked story, my first time getting high, it's not so much funny, but it's decent

Me, and 4 friends went under a bridge, and kept going to some long grass.. We padded down a spot for where we can sit. So we do that, I'm really nervous, cause It feels like I was giving into peer pressure, but at the same time I wanted to try it (I was 14 at the time) So my friend takes his homemade bong out of his pocket, it was pretty decent, I cannot lie. Then he's like .. pass the bud. We forgot it -.-'. So we had to call up a friend and be like, can you hook us up with some weed right now? So he said sure, meet me up at McDonalds, I gotta go get some food..So we start walking there (30 minute walk..) So we get there and he gives us 4g's for $30. We have about 20 bucks left over so we go into 7/11 (another 10 minute walk) and get some stuff to munch on later. So we start walking back, by the time we get there, it's about 12:40 AM. So we finally get down there, pack a bowl, and I get fresh green.

So, being the amateur that I was .. I say "So..how do I do this?" So they explain it to me, and what not. So I take a hit, hold it in my lungs, and pass the bong. Now first hit felt like I was about to throw up haha. So it goes around a few more times, there really high, and I'm just like .. I don't feel any different. So I take another hit (about 1g left) and pass it again. Stand up and then flop over, and say "Holy fuck.. I should have stood up a long time ago" (or something like that.. 4 years ago, can't remember it too well.) For some reason, first time I stood I felt it.

So we smoked it till we had no more. We were just chilling for awhile till one of my friends had this TOTAL blank look on his face then was just like.."Guys..The TREES ARE FUCKING ATTACKING" He starts rolling laughing his ass off, it was hilarious (Suppose you had to be there to find it funny lol) So Now I'm suuuuuper high and we're just thinking .. let's go some where. So I get up and start walking holllllllllly fuck. As soon as I start walking, I'm actually walking upside down. (Not literally, just how I felt) then I start running cause it's the most amazing feeling I've ever experienced lol.

So now it's about 1:30 AM. We start walking and all of a sudden I remember myself at a park (Don't remember walking there at all rofl!) then we meet up with some more friends. Now they knew I was super high so my ex girlfriend took my hat.. Now for some idiotic reason, I thought she put it down her shirt.. yeah..So I just stick my hand start feeling trying to find it, squezzing what ever I can hold and trying to pull it out. And then I go blank again.. can't remember, then we just go back to a friends house and start playing some Halo 2

So that's my story, sorry about the length!!

thats priceless...the first time i ever smoked i had this little joint and i went outside...smoked it...and didnt feel a thing. so i was like "well that was a bunch of bull" and go inside where i sit at my computer and start chatting on msn...then literally like 10 mins later it hit me and i was like..."ooohhh" hahaha. my comp screen was all in 3D...my msn window popped out at me...funniest thing ever. then another funny one...i was laying on my bed with my eyes closed...and my window open with the blind down...well it was windy out and the blind kept flying up and smacking against the window. well this one time it smacked against the window and a bright flash of light caused me to open my eyes and jolt up...and the first thought that came into my head was "ALIENS!!!! im getting abducted by aliens!" then i sat there for a min and thought about it...and laughed...so then i said...to myself..."fuck off sarah ur not getting abducted by aliens" i like that one too...lol

About a million years ago (really 36) there was a real estate agency with a wooden Indian Chief outside on a major highway as sort of an attraction to show the place. It was 20-30' tall. We were totally baked when one guy turned and said " The Indian is following us" The rest of us turned and looked. Sure as shit, he was!! We started running, THe SOB was STILL following us. We ran and ran and ran till we forgot why.
To his day, if one of us mentions Big Chief Lewis we fall down laughing. When I drive by (maybe a half dozen times a year) I just shake my head and laugh.

like 2 weeks ago:

me and 2 stoner friends decide to sit in ones garden on friday after school. he lives like 5 min from the school, so as were walking there some more friends come along.

so were sitting at his garden table with another 2 chicks.

1 has gotten high like 3 times, of which she once puked, so she said she didnt want to smoke.

the other hasnt ever tried weed.
(btw i cant stand her)

so my friend get out these to little balls of black hash, its soft hash.

so the girl that doesnt smoke weed, goes like " ehh is that goat shit"

hes like:" yeah, they let the goats eat weed all day long and then when they shit, they're shit has a really high thc level"

i just go along with the storie and start explaining random stuff about the goat-shit-hash.

and they both fucking belived it, she was looking at us like we were pigs for the rest of the afternoon

my god non tokers are so naiv

hahahahaha thats actually pretty funny. i wonder what made her think it was a goat as opposed to another animal? lol.

Its was prob little droplets

well this one is one of the best funny story of chico really the dog did a great job for the funny point of view and thanks you share this funny story with us and make us laugh and i have a big collection of funny stories from the stories website so i will share next time to all of you you can also visit the website which is stories.pk i hope you will like it most