Thanks for all the good thoughts brothers, but this tattered old dawg isn't able to keep up with commitments now, so adding to the load would be counter productive for all concerned.
Looks like I missed some action if VP is banned, and I do hope that it is temporary. He has a lot of knowledge and exuberance on the subject to share, though his presentation seems to gotten him in trouble.
GL, you mentioned firm and fair, which is the first two words in a three word string, to describe a professional manager of peoples mannerisms. The whole description is firm, fair, and friendly, because the goal is communication and cooperation from his own team and from those whose support he needs to get the assigned goals accomplished. Their job is to get the job done, period!
If your job was to get the job done period, with no wiggle room, and the goal was communication with and cooperation from strangers, how would you approach it?
Fadedawg/Graywolf is a far more loveable person than Moi, because of the beauty of the internet. I am a retired war horse, who fought tooth and nail through a corporate morass of weasels and snakes for over 40 years before retiring, and left a lot of bleeding brothers and sisters in my wake who seriously crossed me, besides some of my own blood and body parts.
He doesn't show his pointy nose and ears until I hit send. Between the time I say what is on my mind, and hit send, there may be considerable editing.
It is a learned trait, that was hammered into me by the fire of collision and disappointment, I promise you, so it is one that anyone can develop.
Start with "I'm OK and you're OK." If you leave I am great (ego), and you are bad, out of communications, and concentrate on facts, the conversation usually goes smoother. Adding either of the first two, brings up defenses and draws out their ego.
Walk around the elephant before assuming the other person is stupid or has nefarious motives, because the elephant looks completely different from the different perspectives.
Abraham Maslow identified a hierarchy of mans needs, and after meeting the physiological needs, the last two that we strive for are esteem of others and esteem of self, not necessarily in that order. Not too hard to see that if we challenge the way a man makes his money (physiological needs), embarrass him in front of others, or diminish his sense of self worth, we will have conflict.
Some of the folks on forums do have financial interest involved, and there is an audience watching, so we have a stage for great epiphanies, or disaster, depending on how the parties involved work things out.
Ask yourself how you would handle it if you were face to face with the person, and they were your miss guided little brother/sister or best friend? How would you handle it if your very job depended on their good will and cooperation?
That leads us to marriage counseling, where the professionals admonish us to fight fair. Stick to the actions, facts and subject at hand, not personalities. Besides spouses, doesn't communications with others, sort of follow those same rules?
