How To Pass A Drug Test?

[closetspace]

HI,
I hope this is the correct forum to post this question in:

I am attempting to unionize my place of employment.
Managment hates unions, and while it is illegal for them to terminate my employment for attempting to unionize, I am sure when they get wind of my plans they will try and find something to fire me for.
so my achiles heel: I am a pothead.
so, if they sent me for a surprise drug test, how can I pass it?
I smoke almost everyday, and would have about 1 hour to ge clean.
it would be a simple piss test.

Where and how much is fake urine?
could I have my non-smoker wife pee into a small container, store it in my car, and use it? how could I keep this urine warm? All I need is an ounce or so of clean urine.

thanks

 

[greenearth5]

I would recommend using a guys urine. I have heard stories on women peeing for guys and the drug test comes back PREGNANT!!! lol... you dont want you boss thinking your on the rag or pregno do ya... maybe thats just a rumor or myth idk

If you would use someone elses urine then you would want that urine to stay 98 degrees. When I pissed in a cup there was a thermometer on the side that showed the temp of the urine. There is no bypassing this that im aware of.

I have allways known when to expect a drug test. When i was on probation I kept a bottle of Test Pure around that I would drink prior to going to see my P.O. and sometimes he would drug test me and other times he would not.

To pass a drug test on the spot... IDK ...

I would stay clean untill this whole thing is over with...

http://www.test-pure.com/

 

[greenearth5]

I would post this in "Toke-N-Talk", that is where most people chill at and allot of them are familiar with this.

 

[TreeSmoker.com]

You have a couple of options when it comes to passing your drug test.

You can buy yourself a "cleanser" product online or from your local smoke shop. These products have been on the market for some time now, and you'll find that there is likely a high-end line of products and a low-end line of products. Ideally, your going through this effort for a good reason and so I really have to suggest that you shy away from the low-end products. Not only that the low-end product might not work, they recommend that you use it a day before in many cases. The high-end products can have you cleansed in a matter of 4-5 hours. If you decide to go this route, remember 3 things. WATER, WATER, WATER.

Your other option is purchasing fake urine either online or in your local smoke shop. I've never personally used this method, though I have heard that this product does work. I believe that it requires you to microwave or boil the fake urine to get it warm enough. In my opinion, you might go this route if you have nobody that can provide you with REAL clean urine.

Which leads right into my recommendation; The most sure-fire way to piss clean, 100% of the time. If possible, have a friend urinate for you. Does it matter if its a man or a woman? Are they even testing for pregnancy, considering that your health information is protected by the HIPAA Act? Who knows!?! If you want to play it safe, get urine from someone of the same gender.

The ideal way to perform this task would involve you bringing your clean friend along for the ride, and letting him pee in the car before you walk in. What will he pee in? I recommend that you use an empty "travel size" lotion bottle, available at your favorite store. This little bottle works wonders for storing urine and is sleek and compact, providing easy storage.

It's important that you wear those whitey-tighties, because thats how you'll be tucking that sleek little bottle right in between your leg in your underwear. Or if your female, god gave you a built-in warming pocket and well... you get the picture. The walk from your car to their bathroom should keep that bottle warm enough to meet the requirements. If you need to, you can always use your hand-warmth to warm up the bottle, once your inside the bathroom.

I have used this method, personally, 4 times. I have seen this method done successfully more times than I can count. The ONLY problem anyone has reported to me, was that they were forced to wait before urinating, which caused the urine to be colder than average. The guy (one of our members) was actually smart enough to pull it off by saying that he had urinated in the bottle, but because they made him wait so long, he also had to poop immediately after he had urinated and so thats why it took him 10 minutes in the bathroom.

 

[budder]

Fuckin drug test bullshit, trying to prove impairment, when there isn't any..just cause you smoked last night, or last week, the test only shows drug metabolites,from PAST use, not THC..What the fuck is THIS country coming to? Anyone agree?

 

[TreeSmoker.com]

I pee for enjoyment, NOT for employment!

 

[Zoobs2317]

Hi my names Louis I'm trying to get a job that requires a drug test. I'm 5.8"120lbs . I was smoking about 2-3 grams a day for 5 years. 3 weeks ago I stoped smoking. Since then I have smoked a tottel of 1gram. My drug test is in a week form today. I took a at home test today and it came up positive. I was just wondering if anyone hade any suggestion on how to pass the test other then using someone elses urine. ThankS

 

[CCCmints]

Hi my names Louis I'm trying to get a job that requires a drug test. I'm 5.8"120lbs . I was smoking about 2-3 grams a day for 5 years. 3 weeks ago I stoped smoking. Since then I have smoked a tottel of 1gram. My drug test is in a week form today. I took a at home test today and it came up positive. I was just wondering if anyone hade any suggestion on how to pass the test other then using someone elses urine. ThankS

get a detox or you're fucked. if it wasn't for that 1 gram you'd probably piss clean on your own lol.

 

[Big Trees]

Knox Jello!

 

[ChiefAlot]

if ur serious go to ur local vitamen store gnc etc ask for there best detox u cant fail just drink plenty of water ur body should flush fast once on the diet it should b like a week to get clean since u got a small frame

 

[qwizoking]

pectin is my favorite, works everytime. ive failed using fake pee. fancy places send it in, they test gender and if your human so dog and fake pee is out. you can pass the cheap pee in a cup test though.....anyway pectin is the best ,its proven. your clean the 2nd time you pee after taking it

 

[Hairy Nuggs]

Im in not rights a pothead. Hell, I only smoke a gram every cpl weeks. I have medical issues that these "prescribed bullshit pills dont help" Theres times where i hurt bad, and my vision goes blurry an bad headaches, but a nice hit and it will calm down my nerves enough to relax me and i can get some sleep. I drink tons of water but im a big guy. 6ft 370. yeah i know i put on alot after my spinal fusuin (that didnt work). What are my chances of coming up hot if im only hitting it once every other week or so. And i usually wont smoke 2 weeks before my pain dr appts.

 

[nameno]

Man 10 days not smoking and you'll probably pass,the guy that gives the test told me that.
I smoke a lot,but if I quit 10 days before and drink lots of water on test day,I'll pass.
I drink lots of water then pee a few times and then I give them the middle of the pee not the first or the last but the middle.
It's been working,knock on wood.

 

[BeastGrow]

synthetic piss

 

[Hairy Nuggs]

Thanks Nameno,
Yea, im to too worried about coming up hot since I physically cant work any more. But, in the process of triing to get social security i dont need them finding a weird minor positive in my records. On another note, ive never done any drugs before in my life. and im quite shocked that marijuana actually relieves some of the pains associated with my injuries. doesnt get rid of them, but sure relieves some pressure to make life somewhat tollarable..

 

[BiggRay]

I was just freaking out over passing my drug test last week and was looking all over this forum and figured I should share my story to help others in my situation:

A little over 2 months ago I was offered a job upon completion of a drug test that they would send me in the mail at any point from then until my start date (3 months). Keep in mind I am a female at 5'6", weigh 125 lbs and I smoke a good amount of weed on a daily basis I didn't smoke for almost 2 months and went to Quest Diagnostics to take my drug screening on April 16. I knew I was 100% going to pass so immediately after I started burning it down and 5 days later (APRIL FUCKING 21ST) I get a call at 8am telling me that my pee was too diluted and that I have to retake the drug test. I was able to get the drug screening postponed for 13 days so I started freaking out trying to find the best way to detox. Now, after 5 days, I passed 2 different home drug tests with 8 days left until the real one! This is how I did it:

1. I FREAKED OUT - I swear when I say I researched everything and anything about THC/drug screenings/Quest Diagnostics.

2. I drank so much water that I felt as if I had to pee every 20 minutes. Once my water bottle was empty, I refilled it and kept the process going. I drank only water - nothing else.

3. I took an insane amount of vitamins/supplements that definitely aren't good to take in such large amounts but hey, this job is a HUGE deal to me. Specifically, I went to CVS and bought Niacin, B12, B6, Biotin, Cranberry Pills, Garlic, Green Tea Extract, L-Carnitine, and Metamucil and took the recommended dose for each.

4. I went out and bought a TON of organic vegetables and refrained from eating any fatty foods.

5. I meant to work out a lot more than I did because THC is stored in your fat but my time was limited. But when I did workout, it was extreme. I had my boyfriend saran wrap my entire body and I dressed in all sweats before running outside. After about only 15-20 around the track, I was dripping in sweat and had to go inside to shower. One time I was too embarrassed to run outside in full sweats (its really hot where I live), so I sat in the car with the heat on full blast with a bottle of water until I felt that I sweat about the same as I did when I ran.

And voila!!! 5 days later I took an at-home drug test and although somewhat faint, the line that designated my urine negative of THC appeared!!!! I have taken one more (a different brand) since then and will continue to drink tons of water until my drug test. I still have 8 days to go so hopefully my pee doesn't come back diluted this time!! I hope this helps!

 

[researching]

Quick Fix is the fix.

 

[kine2731]

fake urine is pretty good from my personal experience.its usually about 45 dollars at the head shop i use.it also come with a hand warmer and a rubber band just in case you haft to wait .hand warmers being the packets used usually for hunters in the winter.you can get them from Walmart also around winter time.