Not that anyone would have noticed but I havent been around much the last 6 or so weeks.
Been fucking around with smack again, snorting and smoking, no needles (haven't used a needle in like 7 years) but I digress
Now lately again, when I smoke weed it makes me nauseous and depressed FUCK
Got a great blowjob on friday night just been and I am sure for a split second I felt good, surely I must have...
God damn it why do opiates have to rape your soul ?!
God I hate it and love it so much it hurts
Pointless thread I know and sorry in advance
I would also advise you to get off the smack bro. Shit doesn't do anything good for you.. this is what is actually raping your soul. You've become a slave to heroin my friend. How would I know? Well, because I've been there.. I've been through the withdrawals.. and for anyone that has never experienced withdrawal from heroin, oxycottins, or rox-E's .... it is PURE hell. It's about as close as you can get to dying, without actually dying. The constant cold sweats, the itching of the skin, the shallow breathing, the extremely deep in the bone aches... yeah. It's not something to play with kids.
Trust me, if you've never listened before.. please, please listen to me. Why? Because, I was young once.. young and stupid. I thought I was invincible just like you do.. I also thought that I could beat the withdrawals.. boy was I wrong. Trust me, its just not something to play around with.
I'm currently on methadone.. because it was the only option I had left, to get clean off the roxxies and heroin. I had tried detox clinics and rehab places. I think I went to 3 detox clinics within a 6 month period.. and then tried two different 'in patient' rehab facilities. I'd get back home from the rehab facilities.. and yeah, sure.. I'd be clean when I got home on the first night.. the second time I got home, from my second visit to the rehab facility, I actually stayed clean for 3 almost 4 weeks straight! But, it was like an inner-voice told me to just go get one 30mg rox-E.. sure enough that's what I did and sure enough, I was hooked again!
I finally gave in, and went and signed up at the local methadone clinic. This was 3 years ago and I've been clean ever since then. Well, if you want to count cannabis as not being clean, I don't.. but some people do. I don't really count cannabis as being a drug even.. I think of it as being more of a medicine.. not a 'drug'.
You might want to think about looking into the methadone clinic man, because eventually.. no matter how 'strong' or 'invincible' you may
think you are, the smack is going to catch up with you.. and you'll die from it.
Just trying to help ya out man.. I know how dark of a place your in, rather or not you want to admit it or not.. is up to you.. but I know that deep down you don't like being in the 'dark time' that your in.
Good luck to you either way man.
peace.