I am soliciting your best advice for being a dad....

Sire Killem All

Well-Known Member
Reward more then punish..... First 6 months baby gonna be happy that Jus what they do, ur female tha one u wanna focus on helping and keeping sane,makes it all easier.
 

Commander Strax

Well-Known Member
the reality is....don't worry, it is not that hard.

when it cries, wipe off the shit, feed it, put it horizional for sleeping

this is important (this should go with out saying, but alas) DO NOT FUCK YOUR CHILD!
as repulsive as that sounds, apparently it happens all the time.

wait it out and around year 5 someone else will watch it for like 4 to 7 hours a day for you for FREE!
 

treemansbuds

Well-Known Member
Ok, we are at the hospital. Waiting. My darling is in bed with a baby heart monitor on. Everything seems good. She's not really having contractions but her water broke. I'm guessing we are not leaving here without a baby even if they have to induce. So we agreed on the first name, not quite the middle name.

So please give me your best advice for the next 30 years. You don't have to be a parent and you don't need to be serious.
Uncle-
We met at the BBQ, congrats on the new addition to the family.
My best advise to you is to enjoy every moment you can, it goes fast. My youngest turns 18 on the 15th of this month. It's hard to imagine not dealing with teachers, schools, little leagues, rides everywhere, dad I need money for..., it all ends soon for me. I think I'll miss it sad to say.
Enjoy it brother, it goes fast.
TMB-
 

sunni

Administrator
Staff member
It's not about drugs, it's about less pain!

Natural birth is not a beautiful thing. It's a screaming bloody mess. Some midwives in the uk have some weird fucked up agenda where they try and demonise women who prefer to have a slightly less horrific birth by opting to use the woefully inadequate painkillers available.
First time round, we didn't realise we were going to get railroaded into a more 'natural' (read miserable) birth.
Second time round, despite the fact that the unit was literally weeks old and had the promise of all sorts of birthing pools with dolphins in, anti gravity chambers lined with bubbles of joy and teams of massage trained oompaloompas to help out, we opted for the 'bed and painkillers, please. We've done this before'.
Nobody argued and we had an....acceptable birth. My missus felt no less of a woman for it.
i watched my aunt when she was having her first child
she wanted all natural no epi..shes a respiratory therapist and is all natural hippy whatever .when we got to the hospital ive never herd her swear so much at all
and i remember her being like GIVE ME THE FUCKING EPIDURAL!!!!
lol it was funny...she was better afterwards when she had her second child she was asked if she had considered epi yet and she was like "yes i deff wont be going through what i did last time!"
 

zeddd

Well-Known Member
get a bigger tent, shits expensive ive got 5, oh yeah don't forget to bash the paedos filthy predators everywhere spesh the gays lol congrats man its what life is all about, regeneration not degeneration imo ha ha
 

Unclebaldrick

Well-Known Member
i watched my aunt when she was having her first child
she wanted all natural no epi..shes a respiratory therapist and is all natural hippy whatever .when we got to the hospital ive never herd her swear so much at all
and i remember her being like GIVE ME THE FUCKING EPIDURAL!!!!
lol it was funny...she was better afterwards when she had her second child she was asked if she had considered epi yet and she was like "yes i deff wont be going through what i did last time!"
get a bigger tent, shits expensive ive got 5, oh yeah don't forget to bash the paedos filthy predators everywhere spesh the gays lol congrats man its what life is all about, regeneration not degeneration imo ha ha
Yeah, I think she has probably had enough of "whiff of the grape" to go for the epidural. Her biggest reservation was the decrease in mobility that the spinal tap comes with. I'm cool with it. Hard to watch her in pain.
 

sunni

Administrator
Staff member
Yeah, I think she has probably had enough of "whiff of the grape" to go for the epidural. Her biggest reservation was the decrease in mobility that the spinal tap comes with. I'm cool with it. Hard to watch her in pain.
ultimately she will make the best decision for her and the baby epi or not who knows ! :D
 
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