I'm an awesome chef, I can make a mean poptart...

Diabolical666

Diabolical666

Well-Known Member
Anyone like to share some quickie recipes???
Can be anything: your fav yummy quick snack, quick dinners, bfast, lunch, potluck recipes, desserts




poptart.jpg

A Mean Poptart:
-Unbox your fucking tart.( Make sure its not fucking broken, leave that one for someone else)
-Unpackage your fucking tart and pop it in the fucking toaster on low setting
-Take a huge fucking rip off the bong while staring at the toaster
-When the fucking tart pops, carefully take it out of the toaster and fucking plate it (do this fast or you'll fucking burn yourself)
-Garnish your fucking poptart with your choice of garnish
-Eat. Enjoy
 
Unclebaldrick

Unclebaldrick

Well-Known Member
Diabolical666 said:
Anyone like to share some quickie recipes???
Can be anything: your fav yummy quick snack, quick dinners, bfast, lunch, potluck recipes, desserts




View attachment 3287893

A Mean Poptart:
-Unbox your fucking tart.( Make sure its not fucking broken, leave that one for someone else)
-Unpackage your fucking tart and pop it in the fucking toaster on low setting
-Take a huge fucking rip off the bong while staring at the toaster
-When the fucking tart pops, carefully take it out of the toaster and fucking plate it (do this fast or you'll fucking burn yourself)
-Garnish your fucking poptart with your choice of garnish
-Eat. Enjoy
Click to expand...
Ok, what are the garnish options with a pop tart?
 
tytheguy111

tytheguy111

Well-Known Member
Diabolical666 said:
Anyone like to share some quickie recipes???
Can be anything: your fav yummy quick snack, quick dinners, bfast, lunch, potluck recipes, desserts




View attachment 3287893

A Mean Poptart:
-Unbox your fucking tart.( Make sure its not fucking broken, leave that one for someone else)
-Unpackage your fucking tart and pop it in the fucking toaster on low setting
-Take a huge fucking rip off the bong while staring at the toaster
-When the fucking tart pops, carefully take it out of the toaster and fucking plate it (do this fast or you'll fucking burn yourself)
-Garnish your fucking poptart with your choice of garnish
-Eat. Enjoy
Click to expand...


my favorite garnish is vag blood from a girls first time
 
Diabolical666

Diabolical666

Well-Known Member
I bring these to potluck dinners as an app

Firecrackers
Slice fresh jalapenos down the middle like little boats
sautee some spicy sausage and mulch it up real fine
mix sausage in 8oz of softened cream cheese
fill up little jalapeno boats and place them on cookie sheet
sprinkle permesan cheese on them at pop them in the oven at 375 till golden brown and the house smells delicious
1lb of sausage, 10-12 jalapenos, 8-12oz of cream cheese, parmasan
You'll be a hit at the party if you bring these babies
 
Ninjabowler

Ninjabowler

Well-Known Member
A bitchin ham and egg McMuffin:
-grab a frozen ass english muffin outta the freezer and leave it on the table and go back to bed.
-after you wake up again try and pry its half frozen halves apart without smashing the shit outta it. Then put it in the toaster but dont toast it until the last minute.
-heat up your pan to medium and add a chunk of butter, then an egg.
-poke the egg with your finger real fast to break the yolk so you dont burn yourself. (Nobody wants hot egg yolk running down their bare chest and onto their genitals because lets be honest, who wears clothes while making breakfast?)
-fold a big piece of ham in half and toss er next to the egg, then a slice of cheese on the ham so it gets all melty.
-now is a good time to toast the muffin, when it comes out chuck it into the pan and soak up as much butter as you can on the side that always hits the floor when you drop it.
-slap it all together trying not to drop it on the floor and enjoy with an ice cold coca-cola because its 4pm and the time for coffee has come and gone.
 
A

anzohaze

Well-Known Member
8 oz cream cheese a donkey dick sausage roll 12 or 16 oz. Brown the sausage theb add cream cheese and mix together. Get some grands homestyle flakey biscuits open them a good spoon full maybe 2 in the center pinvh the ends all the way around place on a cookie sheet. Take 1 egg beat it brush the top of the biscuots w egg wash and add a lil pepper to the top of biscuit bake for i think like 15 minutes or whatever the biscuits need to be cooked for. Eat then amd pass out its so good
 
Ninjabowler

Ninjabowler

Well-Known Member
anzohaze said:
8 oz cream cheese a donkey dick sausage roll 12 or 16 oz. Brown the sausage theb add cream cheese and mix together. Get some grands homestyle flakey biscuits open them a good spoon full maybe 2 in the center pinvh the ends all the way around place on a cookie sheet. Take 1 egg beat it brush the top of the biscuots w egg wash and add a lil pepper to the top of biscuit bake for i think like 15 minutes or whatever the biscuits need to be cooked for. Eat then amd pass out its so good
Click to expand...
Mmmm 8ozs of donkey dick and cream cheese sounds so good right now.
 
tytheguy111

tytheguy111

Well-Known Member
how to make bitchen hot pocket


  • first get off the fucking computer
  • go to the mother fucking bitch tit freezer
  • pull out 2 pack of hot pocket
  • read the damn instructions
  • insert that fucker in the sleeve thing
  • nuke the fuck out of like japan
  • take it out
  • receive third degree burns folding the end
  • have molten hot lava/cheese run down your hand
  • throw it away cuz fuck that shit
  • order a bitchen azz pizza
  • receive the fucking pizza
  • continue watching that fucking anal marathon #6 video
  • cum in your goddamn motherfucking bitch ass faggot piece of shit sock
  • then refer to bullet point one
 
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