Post your best cop story

GreenNugget · Apr 5, 2011

I live in a town that has a high density of cops whose priority #1 mission is to bust kids smoking bud. This one night I was with two friends, and we were driving in my car. It was almost midnight so i was going to drop my two friends off shortly, but we decided to smoke a bowl at a park (horrible idea ) before parting ways. We pull into the park, and get out because it was a nice night and sit down at a park table and start to toke. after about 10 minutes of toking a cop rolled in and before we were in his sight i ditch my piece and sack into the shrubs and bushes, and the cops shines his fucking spotlight right into my face and gets on his megaphone and says "STOP WHERE YOU ARE! GET OVER HERE!" so we walk over, and we are dead scared at this point. now this cop was a young guy, probably around 25 and was alone. the first thing he says is "been drinking tonight young men?" which we werent, so i allowed him to breathalyze me and after i blew zeros he asked if we had any marijuana on us, and i said no and i turned out my pockets to prove it was true and then he asked me why we were at the park. i say "we were just taking a piss in the woods because there are huge spiders in the restroom nearby" after more questions and after checking my eyes and making sure i could walk in a straight line, he decided to start with the threats. YOU KNOW I COULD HIT YOU WITH A PUBLIC NUDITY FINE RIGHT?? AND YOU GUYS ARE TRESPASSING ON CITY PROPERTY!! at this point i just wanted to leave without any fines so i started apologizing and said we were just about to go home, and finally he lets us go, acting like he did us a huge favor for detaining us for a half hour and making me late for my cufew.
the best part of the story is that i came back a few days later, and i found my piece, with the bowl still inside it, and my sack sitting right where i left them. LOL

DaBong · Apr 5, 2011

DaBong said:
I'm originally from south Texas and during my early 20's we used to go over to alot of the casinos in Louisiana to gamble. One night I got totally plastered on rum & cokes and was thrown out of the casino.

Being drunk and having all my friends still inside gambling was too much for me to handle so I attempted to "sneak" back in and got caught by security. They were pissed and decided to call the cops. The cops came and the casino management told them they didn't want to file charges, but they didn't want me to return that night. The cops arrested me for public intoxication and took me downtown to be booked.

On the way to the station I remembered that I had a small roach (like half a joint actually) inside my cigarette pack.

I didn't want to be charged with possesion of MJ of course, but I was handcuffed and there was no way to get rid of it. All I could do was hope that they didn't find it.

So we get to the station and they searched me and didn't find anything, BUT one of them picked up my pack of cigarettes and sure enough, looked inside and found it. They all kind of laughed about it and told the person entering the information in the computer to add a possesion of MJ along with my P.I. charge.

Now at this point I was not handcuffed and the roach was sitting on a table directly in front of me. I looked to my right and there was a HUGE garbage can filled with crap, so I took the oppertunity to quickly pick up the roach and throw it into the trash. The cops absolutely freaked! Slammed me to one side and three other cops started tearing apart the garbage. After about ten minutes they ended up finding it, and placed it back on the same table in front of me again laughing.

Now, the idiots never handcuffed me after this little incident, and after about ten more minutes I saw the same oppertunity again. So....quickly I leaned toward the table snatched up the roach....BUT this time, I faked throwing it into the garbage and when they all dove toward the garbage to retrieve it, I turned the other way and ATE it! LOL

They tore the entire garbage can apart looking for it and of course never found it. With no evidence they were unable to charge me with it, so the only charge they could charge me with was P.I.

I sat in a holding cell for four hours and was released.

BTW: The second garbage can search took like an hour ...LOL

I posted that in a different thread a few months ago. I still have to laugh when I think about them searching the garbage can...that shit was hilarious!

shmow52 · Apr 5, 2011

haha these fuckers were so stupid... i live out in the boonies, so i NEVER see sheriffs let alone cops. So anyway me and a couple friends were coming back from my neighbors house so we crawled through a whole in the fence... apparently my other neighbors thought we were burglars and called the cops on us... So were sitting inside bong out weed out, everything lol. then my bro says dude the cops are here. Everyone is in a shock for a second because THIS COULD NEVER HAPPEN lol.
Anyway they call us out and question making sure it is our house and shit. The funny thing was that the cops were so fixated on my tv they never saw any of the other shit lol. They just kept on saying, damnnn you guys are set up... nice fuckin tv man... lol... it's not even that nice, at least nowadays. it's a regular old 50" plasma. the ping pong, and pool table also assisted ... Seriously how could he not see the weeed lol, i have a fucking sliding glass door haha.

LaKapitone · Apr 5, 2011

Went to see Harold/Kumar 2 with my Hyna & brought a blunt in to smoke during the movie. It just happened to be crowded as Hell at the time, so we sat in the corner/top, it was probably 85% filled. I usually smoke before a movie in the car, but it always seems to wear off & I didn't want it to for this movie. So I smoked 90% of the blunt in the car & took the remaining 10% to the cinema. After sparking it 15 minutes into the movie & taking 3 hits, it was out, but I was satisfied. I was scared mainly because of the spark from my lighter & noise, kind of like opening a soda can in there, aha. About 5 minutes later I see someone get up & go, they come back & another 5 minutes go by & a worker comes into the showing, he stands at the bottom of the stairs for a minute then walks up our aisle. He sits about 3 seats away from us, then gets up & leaves, very awkward & I knew something was obviously up. So I flick the roach down the stairs & stay seated, next thing you know, security comes in & pulls me & my girl out & I hear someone yell "Aha busted!" & I turned back an said "Nah, I'll be back..." so everyone obviously knew. Fucking dicks, don't go to a pot movie if your anti-pot! Anyway, he's like a real cop too, the one that takes us, he works outside security, so he searches us with his team, after asking us, I had nothing to hide so I said yeah. There was 2 cinema employees & him, they find my lighter, that's it, he asks what it's for, I tell him my cigarettes which are in the car, even though I don't smoke. He gives me the lighter back, explains what it's all about then apologizes, & sends us back in, he knew I smoked, but he knew I somehow got rid of it. SO he tried kissing our asses for the 'mistake.'

I walk back into the showing & I look up & just yell "See..." & we take our seats back. Then about 15 minutes later I tell my girl I'm going to the bathroom, then I go to the front desk & ask for the manager & what not. They come out & I tell them I missed the part I was coming too see from the previews, so I want a refund for they're wrong doing, so they abide, I go back to my seat & let my lady know & it ends up being a good night. Also got hooked up with a drink/popcorn, both larges!

Luger187 · Apr 5, 2011

DaBong said:
I posted that in a different thread a few months ago. I still have to laugh when I think about them searching the garbage can...that shit was hilarious!

LOL that sounds like something my dad would do

LaKapitone said:
Went to see Harold/Kumar 2 with my Hyna & brought a blunt in to smoke during the movie. It just happened to be crowded as Hell at the time, so we sat in the corner/top, it was probably 85% filled. I usually smoke before a movie in the car, but it always seems to wear off & I didn't want it to for this movie. So I smoked 90% of the blunt in the car & took the remaining 10% to the cinema. After sparking it 15 minutes into the movie & taking 3 hits, it was out, but I was satisfied. I was scared mainly because of the spark from my lighter & noise, kind of like opening a soda can in there, aha. About 5 minutes later I see someone get up & go, they come back & another 5 minutes go by & a worker comes into the showing, he stands at the bottom of the stairs for a minute then walks up our aisle. He sits about 3 seats away from us, then gets up & leaves, very awkward & I knew something was obviously up. So I flick the roach down the stairs & stay seated, next thing you know, security comes in & pulls me & my girl out & I hear someone yell "Aha busted!" & I turned back an said "Nah, I'll be back..." so everyone obviously knew. Fucking dicks, don't go to a pot movie if your anti-pot! Anyway, he's like a real cop too, the one that takes us, he works outside security, so he searches us with his team, after asking us, I had nothing to hide so I said yeah. There was 2 cinema employees & him, they find my lighter, that's it, he asks what it's for, I tell him my cigarettes which are in the car, even though I don't smoke. He gives me the lighter back, explains what it's all about then apologizes, & sends us back in, he knew I smoked, but he knew I somehow got rid of it. SO he tried kissing our asses for the 'mistake.'

I walk back into the showing & I look up & just yell "See..." & we take our seats back. Then about 15 minutes later I tell my girl I'm going to the bathroom, then I go to the front desk & ask for the manager & what not. They come out & I tell them I missed the part I was coming too see from the previews, so I want a refund for they're wrong doing, so they abide, I go back to my seat & let my lady know & it ends up being a good night. Also got hooked up with a drink/popcorn, both larges!

i love when shit like that happens. its funny that you told everyone youd be back haha

Unnk · Apr 5, 2011

My buddy was on the Detroit force acouple years back...

He got a call one night of some funny smells coming from the local paint factory. He and his partner go to investigate. They search the property for the janitor on duty and hes no where to be found. Apparently the factory was down for 4 days or so for maintenance or something or another. So after exhausting all searches they were convinced that the janitor on duty didnt come in that day. So they were on their way out the door when he noticed that the nasty smell in the building was permeating from the direction of a bunch of giant canisters. They goto investigate and read the sides of the cans, turns out they were the old 50 gal canisters of janitor in a drum (highly caustic cleaning solution). So the first can they choose to open had its top not fully secured. Soon as the drum is opened the stench just pours out of cleaning solution and death. They look in their the janitor was decomposing slush in the barrol. In the end somone had murdered the janitor, stuck him in the drum and left.

Found the Janitor in a drum of Janitor In a Drum

shmow52 · Apr 5, 2011

Unnk said:
My buddy was on the Detroit force acouple years back...

He got a call one night of some funny smells coming from the local paint factory. He and his partner go to investigate. They search the property for the janitor on duty and hes no where to be found. Apparently the factory was down for 4 days or so for maintenance or something or another. So after exhausting all searches they were convinced that the janitor on duty didnt come in that day. So they were on their way out the door when he noticed that the nasty smell in the building was permeating from the direction of a bunch of giant canisters. They goto investigate and read the sides of the cans, turns out they were the old 50 gal canisters of janitor in a drum (highly caustic cleaning solution). So the first can they choose to open had its top not fully secured. Soon as the drum is opened the stench just pours out of cleaning solution and death. They look in their the janitor was decomposing slush in the barrol. In the end somone had murdered the janitor, stuck him in the drum and left.

Found the Janitor in a drum of Janitor In a Drum

was he murdered just for irony. lol

ibeblazd420 · Apr 5, 2011

got pulled over and my and my friends were stoned and just came from tim hortons and ended up having a timbit war so my car was COATED with powdered sugar and the cop thought we were all fucked up on coke and tested the powder...lmao

NBPaintballer · Apr 5, 2011

ibeblazd420 said:
got pulled over and my and my friends were stoned and just came from tim hortons and ended up having a timbit war so my car was COATED with powdered sugar and the cop thought we were all fucked up on coke and tested the powder...lmao

Dude that is so fucking hilarious. plus i love tim hortans canada for life!!

lightbox · Apr 5, 2011

ibeblazd420 said:
got pulled over and my and my friends were stoned and just came from tim hortons and ended up having a timbit war so my car was COATED with powdered sugar and the cop thought we were all fucked up on coke and tested the powder...lmao

h
ahahahahaha one of the best ones

One of my buddys was pulled over and his car was searched, before they went at it he pulled out a cooler to sit on. When the cops found nothing and let him go he put the cooler back in the car.....did i leave out the cooler had 2 pounds in it?

Sgt. Floyd · Apr 5, 2011

I was riding with a friend at the local cruizin loop when we got pulled over for spinning tires in a gravel parking lot. A second cop pulled up and came up to me on the passenger side and asked me to get out. Par for the course when you have long hair in the south. He talked some shit then patted my pockets. I had a napkin that I had just blown my nose in wadded up in one of my pockets and it kind of felt like a bag of weed. It was nasty and wet. He reached in my pocket and pulled it out and asked "what's this?" in a smart ass tone. I said snot in a napkin. He stuck it back in my pocket, told me to get back in the truck and walked off.

Padawanbater2 · Apr 5, 2011

I had just gotten my license, I was still in that provisional period where you can't drive after midnight and me and 4 friends were hotboxing my car in the next town over, everyone was baked and the car was full of smoke, this cop pulled me over and asked what we were doing and asked for my insurance and registration then walked back to his car, came back a few minutes later and told me that little light that shines on my license plate was out then just let us all go! Lmao I was stunned!

wyteberrywidow · Apr 5, 2011

Walking from just buying a quarter pound of mids..Me and my boy just walking down the street about 10 blocks from my house its about 10 at night and its cold(winter time).I turn back i see a black impala with no hubcaps about 2 blocks away..I turn and tell my friend the boyz are behind us like 2 blocks and knowing our luck they would fuck with us i said when they come we running he said alright..a minute later they are right in front of me on a slant from me crossing the street and we were stuck in our tracks...We couldnt run no where and i thought i was going to jail im on probation at the time so i thought aahhhhhhhh shit its over..But the cop asked if we had guns i said man hell no we just smoke weed..He asked if we had any on us also saying he is just looking for guns so we say yeh we do and when they search us they find the quarter pound on me @ first he thought i was talking about a blunt but then he saw the bag he showed his sargeant and i guess his sarge said let them go he gave it back and said be careful lmao....I get like a couple steps away and realized i dropped it right where they all were standing and went back to pick it up by that time they were all laughing

shmow52 · Apr 5, 2011

wyteberrywidow said:
Walking from just buying a quarter pound of mids..Me and my boy just walking down the street about 10 blocks from my house its about 10 at night and its cold(winter time).I turn back i see a black impala with no hubcaps about 2 blocks away..I turn and tell my friend the boyz are behind us like 2 blocks and knowing our luck they would fuck with us i said when they come we running he said alright..a minute later they are right in front of me on a slant from me crossing the street and we were stuck in our tracks...We couldnt run no where and i thought i was going to jail im on probation at the time so i thought aahhhhhhhh shit its over..But the cop asked if we had guns i said man hell no we just smoke weed..He asked if we had any on us also saying he is just looking for guns so we say yeh we do and when they search us they find the quarter pound on me @ first he thought i was talking about a blunt but then he saw the bag he showed his sargeant and i guess his sarge said let them go he gave it back and said be careful lmao....I get like a couple steps away and realized i dropped it right where they all were standing and went back to pick it up by that time they were all laughing

why would you run? Did he have a reason to search you?

racerboy71 · Apr 5, 2011

years ago, i got pulled over in my own driveway for my car radio being too loud.. i was coming home from a 14 hour shift, and had my stereo on loud to keep me from falling asleep on the drive home.. i was like two blocks from my house when i saw the piggy in my rearview, and when i backed into my driveway and turned my car off and was walking into my house, he pulls up and blocks the drive and says... your radio is a lil loud isn't it?? i'm all tired and couldn't believe this douche had nothing better to do then bitch about me radio which was now off and i wasn't even in my car, so i got a lil shitty with the douche, and was all like... yah, and?? well, piggy didn't like that much.. like two minutes later he gets back up, and i'm all, yah, you better call the whole squad over here, my radio was blaring... he looked at me like he wanted to rip my head off.. well, my mom sees all of the commotion and comes out to see what was up, and she comes over and grabs my lunch baggy thingy that i always take to work that had my bowl and a nice sized bag of weed in it and walks it into the house... i had to laugh my ass off at how slick the old fucking lady was, and i then got really ignorant knowing that mom just walked away with all of the evidence... finally, the piggy says to me.. i wasn't going to write you a tix till you called me a jerkoff... so, i all say.. i didn't call you a jerkoff yet, you jerkoff... the $300 fine i ended up paying was soooo worth it just to call that piece of shit a jerkoff... i know that fucker had wanted to lock me up, and if me mom hadn't walked away with my weed and bowl right under their nose, they may have had something to really bust me for, lmao...

racerboy71 · Apr 5, 2011

shmow52 said:
why would you run? Did he have a reason to search you?

i would think that he ran cuz he had a qp on him at the time.. and in some places, cops don't need to reason to search you.. sometimes being in certain neighborhoods is reason enough..

wyteberrywidow · Apr 5, 2011

racerboy71 said:
i would think that he ran cuz he had a qp on him at the time.. and in some places, cops don't need to reason to search you.. sometimes being in certain neighborhoods is reason enough..

Exactly!!Besides in the nieghborhood i was in at the time was know for shootings everyday

mcpurple · Apr 5, 2011

no run in the with the cops is a good one, why would it be. wouldnt it be WAY BETTER if they were not theri in the first place

Tenner · Apr 5, 2011

I smoked 2 joints before a morning lecture, decided to get some eyedrops before the lectures and queued up in the chemist (long queue). I`m waiting, my eyes are red as the devils dick and someone pats me on the shoulder. Its a cop who knows my father in full uniform queing right behind me, he had to have noticed lol Worst bit was, when I turned around and saw a fully uniformed copper behind me my leg started shaking and I had to control that lol It was so damn tense for me!

pwizzle · Apr 6, 2011

So I'm ridin home after school. Let it be known my car at the time is a
76 cadillac seville, mirror tints, 15" 80 spoke daytons.
So im ridin home, turn at the red light, all of a sudden theres blue lights flashin
behind me. Also let it be known Im ridin on fake temporary tags lmao.
They pull me over on a street with nowhere to stop, so im halfway on a sidewalk
and half in the street. 2 cops get out and walk up to the car....
So I roll down the window, the cop on the driver side has his hand on his gun yellin
askin if there is anybody else in the car. I say no. He asks again, I say no.
He asks if Im sure nobody is in the car, by this time im like wtf maybe there is somebody
hidin in my backseat or somethin... but there is nobody.
His partner is on the back passenger door opening it real slow like. Then shuts the door.
And again, opening, and shutting my rear door....
while this is goin on, the driver side cop is asking about my tints and telling me
they're too dark and starts knockin on my driver side window.
He keeps tellin me, "yeah these tints here are too dark. they're illegal" while still
knocking on my window.
Im like, ok. He continues to knock on my window and tells me I need to take it off.
Then, he asks for me to turn off my engine. After I turn it off, he asks if it will
turn back on, and I have to prove to him that it will turn back over...
Dont forget that the guy on the passenger side is STILL opening and shutting my
door...
Before they decide to tell me they're just gonna give me a warning, he gives me
a few final taps on my driver window and tells me they are too dark again...
All the while it was after school and of course I was high.
Now that is some cops pullin some bullshit lmfao

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