dirty urine, clean test

Lynchburgfall

Lynchburgfall

Well-Known Member
Hello again

Well, i'm having a bit of a mental dilemma. I've been on probation for about 6 months now for growing pot ( https://www.rollitup.org/toke-n-talk/26582-i-got-busted-last-night.html ). So far, I've passed every drug test i've taken. I'm NOT complaining about that, I promise. I am complaining about paying $40 for a detox kit every time but the last one. This morning, I passed a drug test after smoking last night but without a detox kit. I didn't have enough money and it's a 3 strikes deal here in NC. I can fail 3 w/o being violated and sent back to court to face my real charges.

So, ok, i do run about 5 miles a day and have super low body fat content (like about 5.5-8%). I sweat a lot and drink a shit-ton of water. Beyond that, I have the ability to lose a lot of weight in a very short period of time (about 15-20lbs/week). I did run 2 miles before my test and drank a little under a half gallon of water. My urine was

Am i wasting my money on these kits? What other factors are at work here?
 
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gangjababy

Well-Known Member
why do you even risk it?? so you got busted yesterday but somehow you've been on probation for 6 months????
 
Lynchburgfall

Lynchburgfall

Well-Known Member
sorry, ganja. it's been a while since i posted. that was supposed to be a link. i was busted back in july of 07. check it again if i don't appear to be too much of a noob.
 
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stizikle

Active Member
I stopped smoking 3 days ago and have been a habitual smoker, smoking multiple times a day, for several years.

I stopped smoking the very moment that I was informed I'd be subject to pre-employment drug testing via a urine test. I have read literally hundereds of pages worth of information on the best way to beat a urine test. Obviously anything that is TOXIC to the human body, I.E. BLEECH is absolutely not a good idea at all unless you have great health insurance and can afford a trip to the ER for ingesting very toxic chemicals- BTW when you get to the ER expect to be laughed at as you will probably be the laughing stock of the ER for weeks and perhaps months to come.

Here is my plan for passing the urine test.

1. Each day I turn my bathroom into a Sauna 3 seperate times. I let the shower run on HOT HOT HOT, and the sink as well. I wait 20 minutes before I go in. I put a towel over my head and shoulders and run in place for 30-45 mins until I am absolutely drenched in sweat. I am sweating to the point that my t-shirt is completely soaked in sweat. As I previously stated I am doing this 3 times a day as to try to burn as many fat cells as possible and get rid of the majority of the THC in my system.

2. I am drinking LOTS of cranberry juice and green tea. Cranberry juice will help clean your kidneys of toxins and the green tea will help excreet even more toxins as it has a great amount of antioxidants.

3. I am drinking lots of water. I am not drinking water for the purpose of "flushing" my system but simply to stay hydrated as I'm sweating out both water and toxins.

4. The day before the test and of the test I will be taking 2 multi-vitamins each day containing vitamin B and B12 along with naicin. I will also be taking a shot of vinegar each day- the vinegar is taken with approx 8-16 ounces of water.

I am hoping that this will do the trick. Obviously there will still be THC in my system though I am hoping by the time I take the test that the majority of THC will have been removed via excerise and what THC is left will be masked by the vinegar and naicin. Also most of the THC should be filtered out of my kidneys with the cranberry juice and water.

To anyone who has passed a urine test or knows all about them please take a look at my plan and let me know what you think. I absolutely need this job!!!
 
Stoney McFried

Stoney McFried

Well-Known Member
Too bad you don't have a nice body temperature vagina to store a small vial of clean piss in.
stizikle said:
I stopped smoking 3 days ago and have been a habitual smoker, smoking multiple times a day, for several years.

I stopped smoking the very moment that I was informed I'd be subject to pre-employment drug testing via a urine test. I have read literally hundereds of pages worth of information on the best way to beat a urine test. Obviously anything that is TOXIC to the human body, I.E. BLEECH is absolutely not a good idea at all unless you have great health insurance and can afford a trip to the ER for ingesting very toxic chemicals- BTW when you get to the ER expect to be laughed at as you will probably be the laughing stock of the ER for weeks and perhaps months to come.

Here is my plan for passing the urine test.

1. Each day I turn my bathroom into a Sauna 3 seperate times. I let the shower run on HOT HOT HOT, and the sink as well. I wait 20 minutes before I go in. I put a towel over my head and shoulders and run in place for 30-45 mins until I am absolutely drenched in sweat. I am sweating to the point that my t-shirt is completely soaked in sweat. As I previously stated I am doing this 3 times a day as to try to burn as many fat cells as possible and get rid of the majority of the THC in my system.

2. I am drinking LOTS of cranberry juice and green tea. Cranberry juice will help clean your kidneys of toxins and the green tea will help excreet even more toxins as it has a great amount of antioxidants.

3. I am drinking lots of water. I am not drinking water for the purpose of "flushing" my system but simply to stay hydrated as I'm sweating out both water and toxins.

4. The day before the test and of the test I will be taking 2 multi-vitamins each day containing vitamin B and B12 along with naicin. I will also be taking a shot of vinegar each day- the vinegar is taken with approx 8-16 ounces of water.

I am hoping that this will do the trick. Obviously there will still be THC in my system though I am hoping by the time I take the test that the majority of THC will have been removed via excerise and what THC is left will be masked by the vinegar and naicin. Also most of the THC should be filtered out of my kidneys with the cranberry juice and water.

To anyone who has passed a urine test or knows all about them please take a look at my plan and let me know what you think. I absolutely need this job!!!
Click to expand...
 
The 504 Refugee

The 504 Refugee

Active Member
Someone once told me just keep drinking water until you have to piss.

After you piss, drink more water. Do that for as long as you can, untill your urine comes out clear like water.

Supposedly the high water content dilutes the test and they can't test properly. Since its not illegal to drink water, then no worries.

I've done it once about 8 years ago when I was in job corps and had a popup piss test. It worked, but then again, I wasnt smoking as much as I do now, not sure if I'd invest a lotta confidence into it again.
 
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stizikle

Active Member
I can see how drinking massive amounts of water might work for the type of drug test where you pee in a cup, the cup is shaken, and a color appears on the cup marking either positive or negative...

The only problem is I'll be taking my test at a Labratory where they'll examine my urine a little more thoroughly therefore I have do a little more work to try to cover things up.
 
grapeoptimo

grapeoptimo

Well-Known Member
just invest in something that is guaranteed, i cut a deal with my favorite head shop and he hooks me up with the best shit for 20 bucks a bottle and the company that makes it does a promo where if you save the upc code for 4 bottles and send them 5 bucks and the codes they send you a bottle for free.

be smart protect your self, stay high
 
R

RockChalkJayhawk

Active Member
Diluteing your piss with water does work! Both with on the spot strip tests and indirectly with lab tests,if you can get clean. Strip tests dont test for water concentraition or any other regularitys in human piss besides temperatue. Lab tests do look for your piss to be within a certain range of water concentraition and amoinia but these test are usually sent off and take atleast 1-2 weeks so by the time you have to piss again for your diluted test you can get your self clean. This is the best way if someone actually watches the urine come from your body....
 
bradlyallen2

bradlyallen2

Well-Known Member
Marijuana in the body is lipid (fat) soluble. Urinalysis relies on the fact that urine, especpially urine that has been stored in the bladder for awhile or is otherwise very concentrated, will become a reservoir for detectable amounts of marijuana metabolites that can be picked up via spectral analysis, chemical reaction, etc. If you have less body fat, more dilute urine, more active metabolism (exercise), or smoke infrequently, the odds of sufficient marijuana metabolites making their way into your urine are decreased (not eliminated). Many testing facilities will not accept a sample that is to clear (indicative of an attempt to skew results via over-hydration). If you passed you are probably a bit lucky and really shouldn't press your luck, eventually you will get caught. In addition, samples are analyzed not only for correct temp but also for physiological chemical signatures such as BUN/creatinine that are difficult to fake.
 
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mistafisha69

Active Member
yo grapeoptimo or anyone for that matter, what is the best product to clean urine. i am bout 6ft 180 and smoke daily. i need to be 100% guarenteed clean for a test or iam royally fucked. any suggestions . i just moved to costa mesa (oc) and dont know anyone that is sober. i dont wanna know what i can do to clean my pee cause i dont have enough time and i will be smoking daily. please i need help asap, dont mean to be a begging bitch but in my circumstances its pass and get off probation or fail and have a drug program for months.
 
JOEGALLO

JOEGALLO

Well-Known Member
I have used urineluck quick fix for a few years now. Everytime I see these threads I post that is the best thing I have found. Before that I used some pills called Quick Tabs. The urineluck quick fix has a 100% pass rate! cant beat that. I always passed my probation piss tests with the pills though. The only thing is that sometimes your piss comes out a neon looking color. My p.o. would always look at me, look at the cup, look at me and then look at the cup but never said anything. Almost like he knew what I was doing but I always passed. I recomend both the quick fix and quick tabs .... quick tabs for supervised piss tests and quick fix for unsupervised piss tests.
 
extracrispy90

extracrispy90

Active Member
Well the cheapest kidney/whole body flush I know of is a good couple nights of partying & hard liquor (the stronger the better) because theres soo much alcohol concentration & it goes into the BLOOD STREAM being carried all over the body and eventually out your kidneys...I smoke casually not chronicly and also have test coming up but I also weight train and run sometimes atleast 5 days a week so for the amount I smoke I think im covered well
 
U

UshUsh

Active Member
I don't even know where to buy detox kits here, anyone know where would be a good place to start? $40 is a small price to keep a job/ stay in high school without getting fucked over from failing a test.
Any help would be appreciated, churr
 
Fuzzotany

Fuzzotany

Well-Known Member
Soooo basically if I'm a fat fuck that doesn't exercise a lot and smokes plenty of weed and cigs... there's nothing I can do eh? Was thinking of paying a friend to piss clean for me and store it in a condom tied to my "stuff" then pin-hole it and release into the test cups... How would that work out? Would the temp be close enough or....?
 
bradlyallen2

bradlyallen2

Well-Known Member
Empty your bladder, then, use a syringe to puncture the lower margin of your abdomen and inject drug free urine from another person directly into your bladder. Desperate times call for desperate measures but I guarantee you will pass. I learned about this from reading about a Dr who did this for years with urine he got from his wife...it was a big surprise when they accidently did a pregnancy test too which happened to be positive...and he had to fess up.
 
Q

Qnh Bsm

Active Member
The test isn't designed to look for THC in your urine. It's designed to react to two things...

1) urine
2) metabolites

It takes awhile before the metabolites appear in your fat cells.

This is why you can be clean, smoke some pot the night before, and pass the test next morning. If I remember correctly, it takes between 12 and 24 hours for the metabolites to build up to the 50ng/mL threshold. At that point you should be clean again in 3~10 days.

Recently, I read a lengthy research paper done by the federal court system on the life of those metabolites, and the proper use of marijuana testing for people on probation/parole.

Also, normally the max time for a chronic user to clean up is around 21 days, not the 30 that employers and testing companies want you to believe.

I'll see if I can find the link to the article and post it here.
 
ImarriedMARY

ImarriedMARY

Well-Known Member
stizikle said:
2. I am drinking LOTS of cranberry juice and green tea. Cranberry juice will help clean your kidneys of toxins and the green tea will help excreet even more toxins as it has a great amount of antioxidants.
Click to expand...



does Naked Fruit smoothies work? they have antioxidants in there so i was wondering if i'd do the same as the green tea?
 
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