I've had lorazapam, diazapam, temazapam, alprazolam and clonazapam.
I went into a controled frenzy under the influence of lorazapam and alcohol that I had never experienced with any of the others.
Alprazolam simply puts me to sleep, even in small doses but I recall the first time I ever had the stuff, there was a glint, a sparkle, a cool frostiness on everything that was enchanting and inviting. After that first time I managed to get more and it didn't have the same effect - more simple dulling than anything else. Through the years I have had that same sort of wonderful experience maybe 5 times total.
Temazapam turns me into a hammer or bag of hammers, a block of wood, dense, thick, thoughts turn slow and unenjoyable and my body gets heavy without the pleasant feelings that normaly acompanies such heaviness.
Clonazapam has yet to really make me happy. I feel tranquil, the chatter in my head quiets, things get slightly distant, both in my field of view and in my attention but there seems to be something missing, worse, I am aware that.... there is something missing the whole time I am on it. I have a script for them and others love them but I just can't quite get behind it.
Diazapam - ah Valium, there is something about it that brings me pure bliss. 10 mg on an empty stomach NO alcohol and within half an hour I am in a slightly removed place, elevated from the cares of the world, perfectly willing to engage others in pleasant conversation - after the "rush" of the first hour or so I will spend the next 4 in peaceful contemplation of things around me, no internal dialog except for "now isn't this pleasant". No chatter, no aprehension, no concern and all of it spiced with a touch of lightness of body and brightness of heart.
What are some other folks favorites and why? (oh, and how much do you take at a time).
