Update: I got matched with my caregiver yesterday. The folks at Green Peace Club weren't joking around when they said they held their caregivers to very high standards. I met my caregiver at the club. Everything was super professional and the meds are AMAZING for a very reasonable donation...
I called and left a message and they returned my call a while later. They said they use some sort of a call forwarding system cuz they're currently in the middle of some sort of transition phase (switching facilities). They had me come in to see if I'd be interested in joining. The people there...