Bizarre News: the strange and different.

rainman36

rainman36

Well-Known Member
cannabineer said:

Pregnant With No Vagina



Omg. File this one under “WTF”. No don’t rub your eyes and readjust, you actually read the title right.
A woman showed up at a hospital in Lesotho, which is a small nation in Southern Africa. She was clearly in labour and ready to pop out a kid. But when the Doc’s put her in a room for examination, they found only a small skin dimple/recess where there should be a vagina. Doctor’s had seen her birth defect, Mayer-Rokitansky-Küster-Hauser syndrome, but still baffled and obviously wanting to help the clearly pregnant woman, they delivered a perfectly healthy baby boy via Caesarean. Then the questions started.
I mean obvious questions. How TF is this woman preggo with no hint of a clamshell??? Upon further investigation, the staff found that she had been admitted into the hospital 278 days earlier for a knife wound. Average pregnancy is 280 days. Apparently the chick had been caught giving her new lover a BJ and got walked in by her jealous ex and a brawl ensued. Knife came out, tempers flared, and two stab wounds to the stomach later, she went to the hospital bleeding. Wait, no seriously, how did she get pregnant?

Well, it’s a relatively simple miracle, but still makes me hang my mouth open with shock. See apparently at the time, she was so wrapped up in the throws of passion she forgot to eat and had relatively low stomach acid. The stab wounds went straight through to her abdominal cavity, and because of the current “activities” immediately pre-stabbing, some little swimmers, nature’s little miracles, got into the wounds past the acid, found their way to a few reproductive organs, latched onto an egg, and bing bang boom, she was with child, but still without vagina.
So next time you straight people think “condom shmondom”, just know that if a knife and a BJ can get you pregnant, NOT USING A CONDOM DEFINITELY WILL!! USE A CONDOM! And don’t stab anyone for god’s sake! Wow, thank god I’m gay. Can a slap to the face with a limp wrist get you pregnant?
Click to expand...
She's such a slut,that the baby wasn't even hers,think about that one lol..
 
Winter Woman

Winter Woman

Well-Known Member
a1 - Copy.jpg

This happened on a desert golf course in the upper Scottsdale area.

Trying to hit the shot, he fell backwards into the cactus.

It took paramedics over 3 hours to pull cactus out before he could go in an
ambulance to the hospital

He should have taken a "drop."
 
Carne Seca

Carne Seca

Well-Known Member
With all my klutziness and propensity towards physical harm I can say with pride I've never fallen into a cactus. Now my brothers and I would tie them on a stick and attack each other but that's a whole different story. :p
 
cannabineer

cannabineer

Ursus marijanus
Carne Seca said:
With all my klutziness and propensity towards physical harm I can say with pride I've never fallen into a cactus. Now my brothers and I would tie them on a stick and attack each other but that's a whole different story. :p
Click to expand...
My momma had a potted cactus that wasn't spiny so much as hairy. i discovered one day that the spinelets caused a ferocious itch, but not immediately. i related this to my kid sister. She didn't believe me. She practically rolled it in her hands and said "see? No itch!" Things got very bad for the next hour, and of course it was all my fault. Brothers of girls are hopelessly misunderstood creatures. cn
 
lokie

lokie

Well-Known Member
At the old house we had a goldfish pond. the land scape around the pond was
a nice cacti garden.

one afternoon I was cleaning the sludge from the pond and fell back into a
prickly pear, a BIG one.

After there were no more curse words in the English language to utter,
I started over in foreign languages, tapering off to guttural moans.

Just as the blind rage of my predicament subsided, my 6 yr old,
grandson looked at me and said "you should not say bad words".

The blind rage returned, this time in silent mode. All I could do was walk away
and start the previous recital over again. All the while picking #######s of needles
from places that should never be paired with a prickly pear.:-?

A good cussing still feels good, but silent cussing loses a lot in the delivery.:cuss::cuss:


its ok. you can laugh now.
 
Carne Seca

Carne Seca

Well-Known Member
Fucking ouch. I've had needles in my finger. I can't imagine them all over the body. Note to God: That is not a challenge.
 
Total Head

Total Head

Well-Known Member
[h=1]Man divorces & sues wife for being ugly, wins[/h]
Divorces are never pretty, but this one is pretty ugly. A man from northern China divorced and sued his wife for being ugly. He won $120,000 in the lawsuit and has once again made the world question the validity of phrases like “marriage” and “love”.
The northern Chinese man, Jian Feng, married his wife and was reportedly absolutely in love with her. Soon, as will happen, she became pregnant and gave birth to a baby girl, which was when the problems arose for Feng.
He thought the baby was incredibly ugly, to the point where it horrified him. The baby resembled neither of her parents, so Feng demanded to know who the father was, because jumping to conclusions about your wife’s faithfulness is the obvious thing to do when you have an ugly baby.
As it turns out, his wife didn’t cheat, but did gloss over the fact that she had spent $100,000 on intense plastic surgery to severely change how she looked before she met him. It’s the kind of thing that can slip your mind on the first date. After his wife revealed this to him, Feng took the only right-minded course of action and divorced and sued her, claiming that she got him to marry her under false pretences. The false pretence presumably being that she was good looking. Incredibly, the (presumably male) judge sympathised with Feng and he won $120,000 in the case.
It’s usually the victim of court cases that you’re supposed to feel sorry for, but it’s kind of difficult to feel sorry for the man who is angry at his beautiful wife for being ugly at some point in her life. If you’re going to feel sorry for anyone, feel sorry for their child, whom will forever be known as the baby that broke her parent’s marriage – with her face.



 
Winter Woman

Winter Woman

Well-Known Member
26 October 2012 - 18H04

German doctors remove 28-kg tumour from woman
Professor Pauline Wimberger of the Department of Gynecology and Obstetrics of the University Hospital in Dresden, eastern Germany, shows a photograph of a tumor weighing 28 kg, on October 25, 2012. Doctors in Germany said Friday they had removed the tumour from a 60-year-old woman who had previously been diagnosed as obese.


AFP - Doctors in Germany said Friday they had removed a tumour weighing 28 kilogrammes (62 pounds) from a 60-year-old woman who had previously been diagnosed as obese.
A spokesman from the university clinic in the eastern city of Dresden said the woman, Irmtraud Eichler, had made a full recovery after the seven-hour operation and was now able to walk again with crutches.
The so-called "borderline" tumour, measuring 60 centimetres (24 inches) by 50 centimetres, attached itself to an ovary and Eichler began to put on weight at an alarming rate.
Her doctor put the weight gain down to a combination of diabetes and a lack of activity and prescribed a course of anti-obesity medicine.
However, when she could barely stand due to the swelling, her daughter insisted on a second opinion and an ultrasound scan revealed the growing tumour, which was found to be neither benign but not especially malignant either.
The operation removed not only the tumour, but also her uterus, ovaries and thyroid, which had expanded, causing her windpipe to contract and have breathing difficulties.
When removed, the tumour filled a wheelbarrow, the spokesman said.
Eichler lost a total of 40 kilogrammes during the operation and described herself as "super happy."
"I cannot thank the doctors enough. I am a new person," she said according to local news agency DPA.
 
Winter Woman

Winter Woman

Well-Known Member
(Newser) – Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's wedding bands are just about done, and they cost … $783,300 each. Pitt and Jolie ordered the matching bands from jeweler Robert Procop, the Sun reports. "Robert’s been busy all year making Brad and Angie’s wedding rings," says a source. "They are matching rose gold bands with a tablet-cut diamond in them and their vows to each other engraved in them. You can’t see it with the naked eye but they both know they’re there." Will recently engaged Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux be able to top that?
 
Winter Woman

Winter Woman

Well-Known Member
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/10/26/milan-marinkovic-tombstone-vagina_n_2025467.html?hpweird=y

When Milan Marinkovic's wife Milena died three years ago, she left a very personal request for him to fulfill: She wanted a stonemason to engrave a replica of her private parts on the tombstone.
Her intention for the rather public display of her privates was simple: She wanted to ensure that Marinkovic, a resident of Belgrade, Serbia, never looked at another woman, according to The Sun.
"I don't want you chasing other women. This way you will always remember me," she said in a letter explaining her bizarre last request, according to the Austrian Times.
Making the request was one thing. Fulfilling it was another.
Although Milena left detailed instructions, including photos, of her sex organ to ensure complete accuracy, her husband had a rocky time finding a stonecutter who would agree to the request. Most of those told Marinkovic the request was blasphemous, according to NewsFixNow.
Despite the struggle, Marinkovic recently found a mason who was willing to do the titillating tombstone engraving and the results are on display at the cemetery.
"Now it's finished I love it and it's a really good likeness," he told the Austrian Times. "And this way, a part of her will always be with me."

Although people have seen Milan's labia likeness, most can't tell what it is. Milan told The Sun that his brother-in-law asked why the bird on the tombstone had such a large beak.
"I couldn't help but laugh," he said.

 
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