budsmoker87
New Member
welcome to my pity party thread
a lot of ppl might read this and say "suck it up...be thankful for what you do have"...and I should be. I have all the necessities covered for me- a roof over my head, healthy wholesome food, water, etc.
but what i don't have in my life is pride. I have no financial stability- I'm 23 and living at home with mom and dad. I left school 2 years ago after becoming very ill and having heart failure...I've made a full recovery since then...and now I find myself in a pile of debt working a dead-end job wherever I happen to find one, essentially just living paycheck to paycheck
College feels like it was a mistake now...granted I didn't graduate (id have another 3 semesters to finish)... all it bought me was 2 1/2 years of comfort (pretty much living in an artificially simple world on campus) and a lot of debt...and yet, to this DAY, everyone seems to treat college as if it's the single most admirable accomplishment anyone can make- to choose to run up tens of thousands of dollars in debt to take a bunch of classes....wtf?? shouldn't a person's accomplishments be acknowledged when they've found a satisfying career that provides a return on their college investment?? that seems all but impossible now
my younger brother now attends the same college i went to and is doing very well academically...he's home for thanksgiving and asked me "so what are your plans now" I felt so offended by him even asking..
"MY PLANS? work and make money...maybe ill be able to save SOME of that money...and then have more room to actually MAKE plans..."
i asked him what his "plans" are
"finish college, get a good job, invest in a bunch of real estate and make money..."
as if it's all that simple...but everything does seem that simple when all is panned-out for you when you're living in the virtual reality that is college...go to a few classes, study a few hours, get good grades and your housing, food, etc is magically all taken care of for the moment...everything feels so worry-free
i sorta wanted to smack my brother, as if to tell him to "wake up, you're getting nowhere just as fast as I am" but of course I didn't because my intentions aren't to downplay his academic success...
anyway, life feels like it's just drifting along down the stream and the current is too strong to swim against...so I'm just floating on my back, comfortably apathetic for the moment with no real opportunity around me
a lot of ppl might read this and say "suck it up...be thankful for what you do have"...and I should be. I have all the necessities covered for me- a roof over my head, healthy wholesome food, water, etc.
but what i don't have in my life is pride. I have no financial stability- I'm 23 and living at home with mom and dad. I left school 2 years ago after becoming very ill and having heart failure...I've made a full recovery since then...and now I find myself in a pile of debt working a dead-end job wherever I happen to find one, essentially just living paycheck to paycheck
College feels like it was a mistake now...granted I didn't graduate (id have another 3 semesters to finish)... all it bought me was 2 1/2 years of comfort (pretty much living in an artificially simple world on campus) and a lot of debt...and yet, to this DAY, everyone seems to treat college as if it's the single most admirable accomplishment anyone can make- to choose to run up tens of thousands of dollars in debt to take a bunch of classes....wtf?? shouldn't a person's accomplishments be acknowledged when they've found a satisfying career that provides a return on their college investment?? that seems all but impossible now
my younger brother now attends the same college i went to and is doing very well academically...he's home for thanksgiving and asked me "so what are your plans now" I felt so offended by him even asking..
"MY PLANS? work and make money...maybe ill be able to save SOME of that money...and then have more room to actually MAKE plans..."
i asked him what his "plans" are
"finish college, get a good job, invest in a bunch of real estate and make money..."
as if it's all that simple...but everything does seem that simple when all is panned-out for you when you're living in the virtual reality that is college...go to a few classes, study a few hours, get good grades and your housing, food, etc is magically all taken care of for the moment...everything feels so worry-free
i sorta wanted to smack my brother, as if to tell him to "wake up, you're getting nowhere just as fast as I am" but of course I didn't because my intentions aren't to downplay his academic success...
anyway, life feels like it's just drifting along down the stream and the current is too strong to swim against...so I'm just floating on my back, comfortably apathetic for the moment with no real opportunity around me