How to Spot a Conservative

[xxRolandxx]

So it may happen that you are at a gathering of new friends and you find someone you are speaking with someone you find to be funny and interesting, but how do you know they won`t turn out to be a knuckle dragging, Limbaugh talking point ranting, spit at the corners of their mouth wing nut conservative. Well fearless progressives before you decide to venture into discussing politics and possibly ruin it by having some high strung nut job screaming about birth certificates and Acorn here is an easy guide to spot them early so you can slowly back out of the conversation and enjoy smoking some good reefer in peace:

#1. They can mention loving freedom and the Constitution with one breath, yet will disregard all of that when it comes to "those dirty hippies" and their weed. Fourth Amendment...hahaha dont be such an idealist. Then the Constitution is "just a piece of paper". http://whitehouser.com/politics/bush-constitution-just-a-piece-of-paper/

#2. Will refer to themselves as a "moderate" or "independent" while spouting off opinions which would make Glenn Beck say "Whoa, whoa, whoa now thats a little too much".

#3. Thinks the Bush Presidency wasn't "that bad" and blames the "Liberal" main stream media for his bad reputation, ignoring the fact that he spent most of his Presidency on "vacation" in Texas while the country went down the crapper.

Now when you realize you are speaking with one of these types, do not make any sudden movements. They are easily startled and tend to over react. Do not challenge any of their claims or opinions as this is the real world equivalent of feeding the trolls. Once you have reached the safety of a nice bong and some sticky icky, kick back and enjoy.

(This is in response to CrackerJaks thread)

 

[Rob Roy]

All the more reason to abandon "left" , "right" partisian politics and become more Libertarian minded. Not the kinda sorta phony "Libertarian" that has become fashionable lately either.

Progressives? What are they progressing to? I'd say there are more similarities between "liberals" and "conservatives" than either dare admit. Both want to be the one with the power and neither respect the individual. Both so called conservatives and liberals are seeking to control others and will wrestle for the figurative and literal gun in the room to be the daddy. The so called "issues" are distractions to keep the slaves fighting amongst themselves. Liberty is the prize, not who gets to control the other person.

 

[xxRolandxx]

Progressing towards a more fair, more peaceful, more humanistic, way of life. Im a liberal because I dont look at a poor person as someone who is there to be mocked for taking food stamps to feed their children, but as a person in need of sympathy and compassion. We are all in this together. Its true, but one side very much has a cold hard view of the world where it is simply dog eat dog and walk if you dont wanna fuck kinda world. Im trying to make this world a better place every day man. Dont you want that? Isn't that something to progress to?

If you dig deep into any true blue conservative there is little compassion there man, its real cold. But they put cute spins on the ice water in their veins. They say "welfare queens" which is a made up BS talking point. But I bet you heard it, and I bet it brings a significant internal emotional response (if you are American).

Like Bill Hicks said at the end of every one of his shows:

The world is like a ride in an amusement park, and when you choose to go on it you think it's real because that's how powerful our minds are. The ride goes up and down, around and around, it has thrills and chills, and it's very brightly colored, and it's very loud, and it's fun for a while. Many people have been on the ride a long time, and they begin to wonder, "Hey, is this real, or is this just a ride?" And other people have remembered, and they come back to us and say, "Hey, don't worry; don't be afraid, ever, because this is just a ride." And we … kill those people. "Shut him up! I've got a lot invested in this ride, shut him up! Look at my furrows of worry, look at my big bank account, and my family. This has to be real." It's just a ride. But we always kill the good guys who try and tell us that, you ever notice that? And let the demons run amok … But it doesn't matter, because it's just a ride. And we can change it any time we want. It's only a choice. No effort, no work, no job, no savings of money. Just a simple choice, right now, between fear and love. The eyes of fear want you to put bigger locks on your doors, buy guns, close yourself off. The eyes of love instead see all of us as one. Here's what we can do to change the world, right now, to a better ride. Take all that money we spend on weapons and defenses each year and instead spend it feeding and clothing and educating the poor of the world, which it would pay for many times over, not one human being excluded, and we could explore space, together, both inner and outer, forever, in peace.

And that man knew what was up. RIP my friend.

 

[robert 14617]

cracker jack has not been here in quite a wile don't you think your attacks should be towards members with recent activity on there accounts

 

[doc111]

cracker jack has not been here in quite a wile don't you think your attacks should be towards members with recent activity on there accounts

ROTFLMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I thought this thread looked like it had been ripped off! Looks like he pretty much took Cracker's thread and replaced "liberal" with "conservative". Hahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!

 

[xxRolandxx]

No attack Mr. Smoking Ape, just a rebuttal of a post currently on the top of the Politics thread list. I'm new here and so I don't know who has and has not posted when, nor is it really relevant to the rebuttal. Why did you feel the need to point it out..or are you just trying to thread jack my post.

And why would you use the adjective "attack" to describe my post? Im guessing one of the local conservatives?

 

[xxRolandxx]

ROTFLMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I thought this thread looked like it had been ripped off! Looks like he pretty much took Cracker's thread and replaced "liberal" with "conservative". Hahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!

Do you have any reading comprehension at all, or did you miss the part in the initial post which said it was in rebuttal to CrackerJak`s thread, not a rip off jack ass. And shove your fail up your ass.

 

[doc111]

You are at a cocktail party and you meet someone new. Of course the convo leads all over, but in the end politics will be discussed.

So is the person you are talking to a Liberal, or not? Now in these changing days of events and topics, it can be difficult to spot them right off. Like flotsam and jetsom, liberals have no true base of principles and tend to drift from week to week, so this has an expiration date on it, but right now...if in conversation you hear anyone utter any of these things with actual seriousness...you know they are Liberal.

1.) That a government-run "public option" health insurance would not extinguish or even harm private insurance.

2.) That cap-and-trade carbon regulations will raise energy costs without injuring the economy

3.) That taxing Peter to subsidize Paul's purchase of a new car is a sound basis for economic growth

4.) That an 85% unspent stimulus has routed the recession.


Any or all of these are a tip off that the person you are talking to has been sipping the kool aid. Do not try and change them!! This will only enrage and confuse them (yes they are easily confused).

Smile and make your way to the saner part of the party.

So it may happen that you are at a gathering of new friends and you find someone you are speaking with someone you find to be funny and interesting, but how do you know they won`t turn out to be a knuckle dragging, Limbaugh talking point ranting, spit at the corners of their mouth wing nut conservative. Well fearless progressives before you decide to venture into discussing politics and possibly ruin it by having some high strung nut job screaming about birth certificates and Acorn here is an easy guide to spot them early so you can slowly back out of the conversation and enjoy smoking some good reefer in peace:

#1. They can mention loving freedom and the Constitution with one breath, yet will disregard all of that when it comes to "those dirty hippies" and their weed. Fourth Amendment...hahaha dont be such an idealist. Then the Constitution is "just a piece of paper". http://whitehouser.com/politics/bush-constitution-just-a-piece-of-paper/

#2. Will refer to themselves as a "moderate" or "independent" while spouting off opinions which would make Glenn Beck say "Whoa, whoa, whoa now thats a little too much".

#3. Thinks the Bush Presidency wasn't "that bad" and blames the "Liberal" main stream media for his bad reputation, ignoring the fact that he spent most of his Presidency on "vacation" in Texas while the country went down the crapper.

Now when you realize you are speaking with one of these types, do not make any sudden movements. They are easily startled and tend to over react. Do not challenge any of their claims or opinions as this is the real world equivalent of feeding the trolls. Once you have reached the safety of a nice bong and some sticky icky, kick back and enjoy.

(This is in response to CrackerJaks thread)

No attack Mr. Smoking Ape, just a rebuttal of a post currently on the top of the Politics thread list. I'm new here and so I don't know who has and has not posted when, nor is it really relevant to the rebuttal. Why did you feel the need to point it out..or are you just trying to thread jack my post.

And why would you use the adjective "attack" to describe my post? Im guessing one of the local conservatives?

If this thread isn't an "attack" on Cracker's thread than what is it?

 

[doc111]

Do you have any reading comprehension at all, or did you miss the part in the initial post which said it was in rebuttal to CrackerJak`s thread, not a rip off jack ass. And shove your fail up your ass.

Ooooooooh!!!!!! It looks like I touched a nerve!

I don't shove things up my ass. My wife does that for me (when she's in the mood of course). I saw the part where you said it was a "rebuttal" to Cracker's thread. That doesn't mean you didn't rip it off and switch around some key words. You call it a rebuttal, I'll call it a rip off. Can't we just agree to disagree?

 

[xxRolandxx]

Do you understand the word rebuttal? For example do you realize when 2 lawyers debate a point they are not attacking each other, but simply presenting conflicting underlying concepts and then debating them. God am I arguing with fucking Jerry`s kids here? Holy shit you are some of the thickest people Ive even encountered in my life. How do you even function?

I swear to God Idocracy is coming true right in front of my eyes in this thread. Please dont have many children...please

 

[robert 14617]

And why would you use the adjective "attack" to describe my post? Im guessing one of the local conservatives?

can you just stop with the name calling for just a little wile

 

[doc111]

Do you understand the word rebuttal? For example do you realize when 2 lawyers debate a point they are not attacking each other, but simply presenting conflicting underlying concepts and then debating them. God am I arguing with fucking Jerry`s kids here? Holy shit you are some of the thickest people Ive even encountered in my life. How do you even function?

I swear to God Idocracy is coming true right in front of my eyes in this thread. Please dont have many children...please

lol!!!!!!! Keep these posts coming! You're cracking me up dude! I just like getting you liberals all worked up. It's sort of a hobby of mine.

A little word of advice. This is the RIU politics section (welcome to RIU, BTW). The "hard time" you are receiving from robert and myself is mild compared to what you can expect from some other members. If you can't handle it, there are tons of other subforums here. There's no need for the insults and shit though. There are rules and the mods will ban you for insults. I see it on here every day. FYI, I'm already retired and have children. Oooooops!!!! Looks like it's too late!

 

[GodSlave]

Im a liberal because I dont look at a poor person as someone who is there to be mocked for taking food stamps to feed their children, but as a person in need of sympathy and compassion.

Personally, I have a hard time with the compassion thing for people who suck off the system and refuse to get a job. I'm not talking about the temporary help people get when they are down on their luck, I have no problem with that, in fact my best friend just went through a rough time and was on food stamps for about 6 months. But in this country we have a serious problem with people who refuse to get a job and feel they are entitled to government support year after year after year after.... Sorry, but I have no sympathy for those people.
I'm a conservative, with libertarian leanings. I believe in the constitution and I believe we should be following our constitution, which currently the fools in Washington have no clue about. They take an oath to uphold the constitution, and then trample it at every opportunity.
Are we still friends?
GS

 

[xxRolandxx]

It is an attack to point out when someone shows a complete lack of reading comprehension in their reply? Who first posted that fail pic? Who said I was "attacking" first?

Well go cry to the mod police cause the mean old liberal was calling BS on your post. I doubt it would be the first time for you, and hey if it keeps the political room open for your unopposed views..i guess that is a bonus. Now who has the thin skin?

 

[xxRolandxx]

GS, one of my best friends is conservative as they come and I love him like a brother. I respectfully disagree with much he believes, as does he in mine. But we see eye to eye. I guess I have a soft heart because Ive been there..done that. Came back stonger then ever. And when I can help people I do. If that is sometimes abused...so be it.

Id rather help 100 people who really need it and accept that there will be some who take advantage. Just as some corporations take advantage of corporate welfare. Thats life man.

 

[CSI Stickyicky]

We have a lot of the problems we have in America because we refuse to engage in peaceful discourse, and instead bash each other as if the people with opposing views were not human.

We all bleed red, shit brown, pee yellow, and smoke green. Conservatives and Liberals, even the most hardcore, are essentially the same. We all care about our families, and our homes. We care about our culture; we care about ourselves. We want the best for our country. We want the best for our kids. We act accordingly. The only thing that separates us all are a few ideals.

Can't we all just get a bong? Uh, i mean "along"....

 

[doc111]

It is an attack to point out when someone shows a complete lack of reading comprehension in their reply? Who first posted that fail pic? Who said I was "attacking" first?

Well go cry to the mod police cause the mean old liberal was calling BS on your post. I doubt it would be the first time for you, and hey if it keeps the political room open for your unopposed views..i guess that is a bonus. Now who has the thin skin?

Ummm, that was robert that said you were attacking first. Calling BS on my post??????? Could you please elaborate for me? It must be my failed reading comprehension because I didn't see you call BS on anything. I simply saw you start slinging insults. Could you please show me where I or anybody else in this thread (except you) is telling anybody to stick something up their ass or being insulting in anyway? I don't report people like you to the mods. I've seen your type around here and usually your type doesn't last too long. No, I'm not gonna report you to the "mod police". They read these posts too so there is no need for me to report anything. I'm sorry you got so butthurt by my post. Better get used to it if you're gonna post in politics.

 

[Hemlock]

Do you understand the word rebuttal? For example do you realize when 2 lawyers debate a point they are not attacking each other, but simply presenting conflicting underlying concepts and then debating them. God am I arguing with fucking Jerry`s kids here? Holy shit you are some of the thickest people Ive even encountered in my life. How do you even function?

I swear to God Idocracy is coming true right in front of my eyes in this thread. Please dont have many children...please

We all think the same about you,,, troll...what we are hoping is that you don't have any kids so we don't have to feed them.

 

[GodSlave]

GS, one of my best friends is conservative as they come and I love him like a brother. I respectfully disagree with much he believes, as does he in mine. But we see eye to eye. I guess I have a soft heart because Ive been there..done that. Came back stonger then ever. And when I can help people I do. If that is sometimes abused...so be it.

Id rather help 100 people who really need it and accept that there will be some who take advantage. Just as some corporations take advantage of corporate welfare. Thats life man.

I understand your point, and believe me, I've been there too. Many years ago, I used to donate plasma just to make it week to week. Lived in an old beat up trailer dump, ate at the mission, and got donations from the salvation army and various churches to help with my bills.
Because of that help I received during that time of my life, I always donate as much money as I can to such organizations. I also give freely from my wallet when a homeless person asks for $$. I don't give them cash a lot, but I keep gift cards to McDonalds and stuff on me to give out.
So, I do have compassion for people. But what you may not completely understand is that here in the US, we have a situation where a crap ton of people are unwilling to help themselves. It's not that they are just down on their luck, it's that they choose this lifestyle. Meanwhile all the working people get to pay their way. Also, we have a serious problem with illegals, which are draining our system by the minute. My neighbor is a retired cop, was wounded on the job, and is now on disability and a small retirement. He barely keeps his head above water, and does not get food stamps. So, how do you think it makes him feel when he goes to the grocery store and has to stand in line behind a family of non english speaking people, who most likely are illegal (we have a big time illegal population in my town) and watch them use food stamps while he just barely makes it every month?

It's not right my friend, no type of justification can make it right to take from one person to give to another. Which is essentially what is happening here in the US, wealth redistribution. Working people go and work to pay their bills, AND all the lazy peoples' bills.
GS

 

[xxRolandxx]

ROTFLMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I thought this thread looked like it had been ripped off! Looks like he pretty much took Cracker's thread and replaced "liberal" with "conservative". Hahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!

Riiight. Not insulting at all. Why I can see now how shocked...dare I say downright insulted you must have been to my reaction to your thoughtful reply to my thread...