So in the fall of 2013, around October, My girlfriend at the time and I were getting into fights and things were rough.
I felt the need to take lsd + mdma with Her because I wanted to bring back memories of when we first met.
Which was obviously a stupid idea and it kind of was...
I ate about 300-400 mgs of mdma around 6 or 7 p.m. 350 mgs + of mdma at once is a pretty big dose.
Once I started rolling or feeling the effects of mdma, I called or texted my girlfriend asking if she wanted to tripp.
She seem weird about it, seeing as we were fighting at the time. But she came over anyway and we ate some more molly.
I gave her about 300-400 mgs as well. she seemed weird when I gave her the molly like I was poisoning her.
we both were rolling at this point and not having any judgement of what we were doing. or at least I wasnt.
We both have the idea to eat some L. I wanted to re create Our first time meeting lsd experiences but I think My girlfriend at the time wanted to see my karma.... and wow... did she? hahahaha
We ate the acid. I ate around 300 micrograms and She ate about 350-400 micograms.
I was out of control. My girlfriend seemed to be quite grounded. The more and more the acid kicked in, the more and more the euphoric effects of the mdma wore off, even though I could feel the ecstasy. My mind started running so fast, that I could not even slow it down. I remember My mind telling Me to breathe and stay calm but it kicked it so quick I didn't even have the time or awareness to catch this thought, even though I was completely aware of it at the time. I ignored this feeling and starting losing Myself. I looked at My girlfriend and shook My head with confusion, knowing she is my life companion but as My ego started to fade away, I lost sight of what was even going on. This can be quite a scary situation , especially if the users/trippers have no idea or little experience with the substance. My girlfriend at the time was very little experienced with tripping AND I think She was trying to get inside My head to see who I truly am...for some reason.
Anyway...
I start making out with My girlfriend to ground Myself and help Me remember who I was at the time. She went with it , which helped ground Me but this lsd + mdma combo came on so quickly and was so intense that I lost it... We were living at this employee housing, off season for a ski resort at the time in the summer so barley an occupants were there since it was off season.. If it was during the ski season, the cops most likely would have been called because I made quite a ruckus.
Since My girlfriend and I at the time were getting into fights, I was obviously questioning continuing the relationship. So the more as the lsd kicked in, the more I got into My head and wondered if She was 'the one'. At this point I was naked and My roommate was trying to sleep. I got caught in a loop where I would go into and out of My apartment [employee housing] front door so the door would slam every time I would go in and out. This was about 1 in the morning at this point. Every time I re-entered the apartment, I smelled what it would smell like every time I would go in the apartment. And this disgusted Me and brought Me to wonder if this was the right place. Then since I was in a psychotic , psychedelic trip, I got into a loop of re entering and leaving the building. Knowing that I needed to end the relationship but a 12 hour lsd trip which felt like eternity got in the way. So one can only imagine how tough it would be to be patient with a head filled with acid and thoughts are spinning that fast to be able to ground oneself to legitimately and rationally think through what was going on... This loop of Me re entering and exiting the apartment happened for a good 15 cycles. Around that time, I got disoriented, confused and dizzy. And the smell of the apartment + mix of TOO MUCH mdma in my system made Me throw up all over this blanket that was covering My naked body.
So imagine some spun out hippie, going in and out of an apartment front door, naked with a puke covered blanket all over him , saying "i love You but I need to move on. Its bout time" over...and over...and over again.
AT this point, My roommate wakes up and goes to the bathroom and is wondering what was going on. Seeing as I was screaming "i love You but I need to move on. Its bout time" over...and over...and over again. and the front door kept slamming because I was in that loop... So after My roommate goes to the bathroom, I go into my room where My girlfriend was, probably confused and amazing at what was going on.... I kept unnecessarily getting and helping My girlfrined with things , like getting her water for her even if was on arms reach in front of her. Its like she thought I was being TOO nice. And said "I've got it, You dont need to be THAT nice to Me." and this made me have a relapse and go " well , if You dont want me to do the right thing, i will just do the WRONG thing.!!!!"
Then I shoved My finger up My nose, and stuck My tongue out. Then I tried punching a hole into My window.
Then I tried ripping My face off. Then I ran up to My roommate and tried to kiss Him because I knew that was the wrong thing to do. He and I are both males. He pushed Me away from Him and didnt let Me kiss him [thank God] and he ripped me off of him and ran away into his room and locked the door.
After this, I for some reason turned the shower in the bathroom on and got water EVERYWHERE.
My girlfrined didnt really take control of the situation, she just kind of let me do what I was doing.
which kind of pissed me off but I was so gone , i didnt even care.
After trying to kiss my male, roommate, I went back into My room and my girlfriend shut the door and tried to contain the situation. It was about 2 a.m. at this point and I'm still naked... And this is when things started getting REALLY trippy.
I felt like everyone around me was against me. I felt like everyone's sober self was a facade or fake reality and when we all took the acid, these fake walls came down and it was like i could see right through My girlfriend...
I thought She was hired by the cia, to come into my life and act like she liked me and became my girlfriend.
Same with my roommate. It was like they were both on the same team and against me. and the acid made me become aware of it. For some reason, this hallucination of an "aware" mind set, grew and grew and it grew so much that I convinced Myself that My girlfriend was no longer My girlfriend. She was some spy trying to figure out who I was, and was up to.
And then all of a sudden, I hear this loud buzzing sound, like a large fly was in the room...
I look up and this giant fly caught My eye... I was so high at this point on lsd and mdma that I could not figure out what was going on... I still do not know til this day if it was true or not but I swear this fly was not a real fly.... It had a camera and everything. I was convinced that My girlfreind was a part of this and It drove My insane. The feeling of betrayal is one of the worst feelings in the world. Especially from someone You trusted like Your own girlfriend...
Til this day, I still do not know if I hallucinated this 'spy fly' or not but something deep within Me has enough wisdom and judgement to be able to discern that was not a real fucking fly.... This exact trip destroyed Our relationships.
Both My roommate AND girlfriend at the time...
Moral of the story.... DON'T EAT YOUR MDMA BEFORE YOUR LSD ! ! ! ! hahahahaha
but for real... Using psychoactive to enhance a relationship with anyone, is a stupid idea. It's like forcing it.